Worried About Canadian SARS

Floods and diseases and pestillentaries - Archie Bunker

Surgery is the cry of defeat in medicine. - Martin H. Fischer

Borscht: Beet soup with high blood pressure - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Panic plays no part in the training of a nurse. - Elizabeth Kenny

Psychoanalysis is the disease it claims to cure. - Karl Kraus

Never go to a doctor whose office plants have died. - Erma Bombeck

The greatest healing therapy is friendship and love. - Hubert H Humphrey

Hope is medicine for a soul that's sick and tired. - Eric Swensson

I had plastic surgery last week. I cut up my credit cards. - Henny Youngman

Document: Repeating what your Doctor told you in your own words - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

I've never had major knee surgery on any other part of my body. - Winston Bennett

I was under medication when I made the decision not to burn the tapes. - Richard M Nixon

I do believe that laughter is the best medicine - it cures everything. - Radhika Apte

The best way to reduce the cost of medical care is to reduce the illness. - Arlen Specter

The good-news stories in medicine are early detection, early intervention. - Thomas R Insel

A woman doctor is only good for women's problems - like your groinocology - Archie Bunker

Oh, when I was a kid, I was ugly. When I was born, the doctor smacked my mother. - Rodney Dangerfield

We have to live our lives as if we are dying of a fatal disease. Because we are. - Phineas Narco

An ugly woman is a disease of the stomach; a handsome woman a disease of the head. - Italian Proverb

Co-Operation: An exchange between a woman and a man in which she coos and he operates - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

We go by the major vote, and if the majority are insane, the sane must go to the hospital. - Horace Mann

The biggest disease today is not leprosy or tuberculosis, but the feeling of being unwanted. - Mother Teresa

The practice of medicine occurs even in primitive society, but law accompanies civilization. - Saying

Disease is war with the laws of our being, and all war, as a great general has said, is hell. - Lewis G. Janes

The yoga mat is a good place to turn when talk therapy and antidepressants aren't enough. - Amy Weintraub

As it takes two to make a quarrel, so it takes two to make a disease, the microbe and its host. - Charles V. Chapin

Many people find themselves with illness as they become successful: higher blood pressure and diabetes. - Zong Qinghou

Some of these people need ten years of therapy - ten sentences of mine do not equal ten years of therapy. - Oscar Wilde

I think I have a disease called spontaneous disclosure. I need to tell everyone my life story instantaneously. - Kelly Ripa

Even if the doctor does not give you a year ... make one brave push and see what can be accomplished in a week. - Robert Louis Stevenson

In the sick room, ten cents' worth of human understanding equals ten dollars' worth of medical science. - Martin H. Fischer

The New England Journal of Medicine reports that 9 out of 10 doctors agree that 1 out of 10 doctors is an idiot. - Jay Leno

I welcome him like I welcome cold sores. He's from England, he's angry, and he's got Mad Power Disease. - Paula Abdul

The best doctor in the world is a veterinarian. He can't ask his patients what is the matter - he's got to know. - Will Rogers

I'm planning to adopt a dog soon. It wasn't my first choice but my Doctor told me I can't have any biologically. - Bill Murray

I've got a great doctor. He gave a guy six months to live. They couldn't pay his bill so he gave him another six months. - Henny Youngman

Menopause is thicker than water. When we talk and laugh about it, we learn and relax. It's a life transition, not a disease. - Unknown

I went to the doctor because I'd swallowed a bottle of sleeping pills. My doctor told me to have a few drinks and get some rest. - Rodney Dangerfield

Lost wealth may be replaced by industry; lost knowledge by study; lost health by temperance or medicine; but lost time is gone forever. - Samuel Smiles

I think it would be interesting if old people got anti-Alzheimer's disease where they slowly began to recover other people's lost memories. - George Carlin