Redneck 2-Minute Poetry Contest
Have you been to Timbuktu?

It was the finals in a poetry contest. The two finalists were a Yale graduate and a Redneck. The final contest was for them to make a poem in two minutes containing a word that would be given to them by the judges. The word was TIMBUKTU.

The Yale graduate was the first to give his poem:

Slowly across the desert sand
Trekked a lonely caravan.
Men on camels two by two
Destination Timbuktu.

The audience went wild. They thought the Redneck would never stand a chance against the Yale graduate. Nevertheless, the Redneck stood up and gave his poem:

Me and Tim a hunting went
Met three whores in a pop-up tent.
They were three and we were two
So I bucked one and Timbuktu.

The Redneck won hands down.

Wine is bottled poetry. - Robert Louis Stevenson

Dancing is silent poetry. - Simonides

Reverse: Repeating poetry - Daffynitions

Music is the poetry of the air. - Jean Paul Richter

Always be a poet, even in prose. - Charles Baudelaire

Vice Versa: Dirty Italian poetry - Daffynitions

Love is the poetry of the senses. - Honore de Balzac

The poetry of earth is never dead. - John Keats

Poetry should only occupy the idle. - Lord Byron

The perfect man? A poet on a motorcycle. - Lucinda Williams

Poetry is what gets lost in translation. - Robert Frost

You can't write poetry on the computer. - Quentin Tarantino

You campaign in poetry; you govern in prose. - Mario Cuomo

All bad poetry springs from genuine feeling. - Oscar Wilde

Poetry is a way of taking life by the throat. - Robert Frost

A poet can survive everything but a misprint. - Oscar Wilde

To be a poet is a condition, not a profession. - Robert Frost

At the touch of love, everyone becomes a poet. - Plato

Valentine's Day is the poet's holiday. - Ted Kooser

Pure mathematics is the poetry of logical ideas. - Albert Einstein

Poetry is the clear expression of mixed feelings. - W H Auden

'Therefore' is a word the poet must not know. - Andre Gide

If your life is burning well, poetry is just the ash. - Leonard Cohen

It is always fatal to have music or poetry interrupted. - George Eliot

I'd rather be a great bad poet than a good bad poet. - Ogden Nash

Poetry is about the grief. Politics is about the grievance. - Robert Frost

All poetry is a reproduction of the tones of actual speech. - Robert Frost

Everyone makes fun of the Redneck until the Zombie Apocalypse. - Unknown

Prose is a museum, where all the old weapons of poetry are kept. - T.E. Hulme

A poet never takes notes. You never take notes in a love affair. - Robert Frost

Poetry is the statement of a relation between a man and the world. - Wallace Stevens

A poet in history is divine, but a poet in the next room is a joke. - Max Eastman

Most people ignore most poetry because most poetry ignores most people. - Adrian Mitchell

There is no money in poetry, but then there is no poetry in money, either. - Robert Graves

Proper names are poetry in the raw. Like all poetry they are untranslatable. - W H Auden

I have nature and art and poetry, and if that is not enough, what is enough? - Vincent van Gogh

You know you're a redneck if your home has wheels and your car doesn't. - Jeff Foxworthy

Poetry is when an emotion has found its thought and the thought has found words. - Robert Frost

You got to have smelt a lot of mule manure before you can sing like a hillbilly. - Hank Williams

Books of poetry by young writers are usually promissory notes that are never met. - Oscar Wilde

The dark night was the first book of poetry, and the constellations were the poems. - Chet Raymo

Poetry spills from the cracks of a broken heart, but flows from one which is loved. - Christopher P. Rubero

I became a poet at the age of sixteen. I did not intend to do it. It was not my fault. - Margaret Atwood

There are two ways of disliking poetry; one way is to dislike it, the other is to read Pope. - Oscar Wilde

Some people will tell you there is a great deal of poetry and fine sentiment in a chest of tea. - Ralph Waldo Emerson

Like a great poet, nature knows how to produce the greatest effects with the most limited means. - Heinrich Heine

He lives the poetry that he cannot write. The others write the poetry that they dare not realize. - Oscar Wilde

You might be a redneck if your favorite hunting dog has a bigger tombstone than your grandfather. - Jeff Foxworthy

Writing criticism is to writing fiction and poetry as hugging the shore is to sailing in the open sea. - John Updike

Pound's crazy. All poets are. They have to be. You don't put a poet like Pound in the loony bin. - Ernest Hemingway

A poet can write about a man slaying a dragon, but not about a man pushing a button that releases a bomb. - W H Auden

You might be a redneck if your wheelbarrow breaks and it takes four relatives to figure out how to fix it. - Jeff Foxworthy

The greatest ideas, the most profound thoughts, and the most beautiful poetry are born from the womb of silence. - William A. Ward

I do not see how a man can work on the frontiers of physics and write poetry at the same time. They are in opposition. - Paul Dirac

The poet is in command of his fantasy, while it is exactly the mark of the neurotic that he is possessed by his fantasy. - Lionel Trilling

As the poet said, "Only God can make a tree" - probably because it's so hard to figure out how to get the bark on. - Woody Allen

If your daily life seems poor, do not blame it; blame yourself, tell yourself that you are not poet enough to call forth its riches. - Rainer Maria Rilke

If I had my life to live over again, I would have made a rule to read some poetry and listen to some music at least once every week. - Charles Darwin

Deals are my art form. Other people paint beautifully on canvas or write wonderful poetry. I like making deals, preferably big deals. - Donald Trump

You can imagine me as a kid growing up in redneck Texas with ballet shoes, tucking the violin under my arm. I had to fight my way up. - Patrick Swayze

Mancation: A man's vacation. Generally includes lots of beer, a Redneck grill, slabs of meat for cooking and a sack of fireworks. - Daffynitions

When a poet digs himself into a hole, he doesn't climb out. He digs deeper, enjoys the scenery, and comes out the other side enlightened. - Criss Jami

Hypothesis: 1. First thing a Redneck teenager says to his father on the phone; 2. Hippo, horse; thesis, placing: putting something on a horse. - Daffynitions

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How To Cook A Deer
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My Kind Of Exercise
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Redneck Anniversary Gift
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Redneck Wireless Internet System
Redneck’s Favorite Bar Stool
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Responsible Hi-Tech Redneck
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Sunday Drive in the Country
Tabasco Sanitizer
Tennessee Family
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