The Van Gogh Family Tree

After much careful research, it has been discovered that the
artist Vincent Van Gogh had many relatives. Among them were...


His dizzy aunt: Verti Gogh
His unemployed cousin: Let Gogh
The brother who ate prunes: Gotta Gogh
The brother who worked at a convenience store: Stopn Gogh
The brother who bleached his clothes white: Hue Gogh
His obnoxious brother: Please Gogh
The cousin from Illinois: Chi-ca Gogh
His magician uncle: Where-diddy Gogh
His Mexican cousin: A Mee Gogh
The Mexican cousin’s American half brother: Grin Gogh
The nephew who drove a stage coach: Wells-far Gogh
The constipated uncle: Can’t Gogh
The ballroom dancing aunt: Tang Gogh
The bird lover uncle: Fla-min Gogh
His nephew psychoanalyst: E Gogh
The fruit loving cousin: Man Gogh
An aunt who taught positive thinking: Way-to Gogh
The little bouncy nephew: Poe Gogh
The bouncy nephew’s brother who lives in Penticton: Ogo Poe Gogh
The grandfather from Yugoslavia: U Gogh
A sister who loved disco: Go Gogh
A pregnant sister: Pre Gogh
The grandmother who was a 1950’s carhop @ A&W: Letsall Gogh
His Italian uncle: Day Gogh
His uncle with a corporate image: Lo Gogh
His niece who travels the country in a van: Winnie Bay Gogh
And the moroff who browses joe-ks.com: Where2 Gogh

And there ya Gogh...



QuotaBills
By ancestry, I was born to rule. - Nelson Mandela

Ancestry is a hereditary condition. - Unknown

A happy family is but an earlier heaven. - Sir John Bowring

My parents put a live teddy bear in my crib. - Woody Allen

Poverty is the parent of revolution and crime. - Aristotle

I wonder if you can refuse to inherit the world. - Bill Watterson

I come from a family where gravy is considered a beverage. - Erma Bombeck

The meek shall inherit the earth, but not the mineral rights. - J Paul Getty

The one thing children wear out faster than shoes is parents. - John J. Plomp

I'm super laid back. I'm from Texas. I love my family. - Selena Gomez

On Halloween, the parents sent their kids out looking like me. - Rodney Dangerfield

I know love at first sight can work. It happened to my parents. - George Clooney

When I was a kid my parents moved a lot, but I always found them. - Rodney Dangerfield

I think the family was from Hungaria. (talking about Noah's Ark) - Archie Bunker

Happiness is having a large, caring, close-knit family in another city. - George Burns

Gentility is what is left over from rich ancestors after the money is gone. - John Ciardi

I write to keep in contact with our ancestors and to spread truth to people. - Sonia Sanchez

We do not inherit the earth from our parents. We borrow it from our children. - Unknown

It is even harder for the average ape to believe that he has descended from man. - H L Mencken

My parents treated my like I had a brain - which, in turn, caused me to have one. - Diane Lane

When we are planning for posterity, we ought to remember that virtue is not hereditary. - Thomas Paine

Psychiatry enables us to correct our faults by confessing our parents' shortcomings. - Laurence J Peter

He that has no fools, knaves, nor beggars in his family was begot by a flash of lightning. - Thomas Fuller

We are, in the comics, the last frontier of good, wholesome family humor and entertainment. - Bill Keane

Everyone has ancestors and it is only a question of going back far enough to find a good one. - Howard K. Nixon

I grew up in an Irish Catholic family, and I think they force you to watch every James Cagney movie. - Jimmy Fallon

It's going to be fun to watch and see how long the meek can keep the earth after they inherit it. - Kim Hubbard

A man who thinks too much about his ancestors is like a potato - the best part of him is underground. - Henry Cooper

Until you become a parent, you can't begin to discover your capacity for strength, love and fatigue. - Peter Gallagher

Every family story has 1,000 other stories contained within it, like an unending series of nesting dolls. - Alison Pick

Any living cell carries within it the experiences of a billion years of experimentation by its ancestors. - Max Delbrook

Children begin by loving their parents; after a time they judge them; rarely, if ever, do they forgive them. - Oscar Wilde

I don't think he's gonna come Edith. He just ain't got none of that, waddya call, family unconscious. - Archie Bunker

Life's golden age is when the children are too old to need babysitters and too young to borrow the family car. - Unknown

The unjustifiable severity of a parent is loaded with this aggravation, that those whom he injures are always in his sight. - Joseph Addison

We split from our common ancestor with the octopus half a billion years ago. And yet, you can make friends with an octopus. - Sy Montgomery

A sense of duty is useful in work but offensive in personal relations. People wish to be liked, not to be endured with patient resignation. - Bertrand Russell

What ya eat ain't got nuttin' to do with how old ya are. That all depends on your ancestors. It's what they call a matter of heresy. - Archie Bunker

Like all parents, my husband and I just do the best we can, and hold our breath and hope we've set aside enough money for our kids' therapy. - Michelle Pfeiffer

Blind dates are treacherous. You don't know who this person is. You wonder, "Should I call my grandma during coffee to get out of this?" - Alan Alda


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Family Tree
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25-Feb-2020