When a man volunteers to do the BBQ the following chain of events are put into motion…
1) The woman buys the food.
2) The woman makes the salad, vegetables, and dessert.
3) The woman prepares the meat for cooking, places it on a tray along with the necessary cooking utensils and sauces, and takes it to the man who is lounging beside the grill - beer in hand.
Here comes the important part…
4) THE MAN PLACES THE MEAT ON THE GRILL.
5) The woman goes inside to organize the plates and cutlery.
6) The woman comes out to tell the man that the meat is burning. He thanks her and asks if she will bring another beer while he deals with the situation.
7) THE MAN TAKES THE MEAT OFF THE GRILL AND HANDS IT TO THE WOMAN.
8) The woman prepares the plates, salad, bread, utensils, napkins, sauces, and brings them to the table.
9) After eating, the woman clears the table and does the dishes.
And most of all…
10) Everyone PRAISES the man and THANKS him for his cooking efforts.
11) The man asks the woman how she enjoyed “her night off.” And, upon seeing her
annoyed reaction, concludes that there’s just no pleasing some women!
Either war is obsolete, or men are. - R Buckminster Fuller
Men who never get carried away should be. - Malcolm Forbes
Eternity is two people and a roast turkey. - James Dent
An old man in love is like a flower in winter. - Portuguese Proverb
Few women admit their age. Few men act theirs. - Unknown
In this world a man must either be an anvil or hammer. - Henry W. Longfellow
Love is the magician that pulls man out of his own hat. - Ben Hecht
Man is only half himself, the other half is his expression. - Ralph Waldo Emerson
A man's home is his castle, and his wife is the janitor. - Lucille Kallen
Lord, Lord! How subject we old men are to this vice of lying. - William Shakespeare
The surest way to make a monkey out of a man is to quote him. - Robert Benchley
Success isn't everything, but it makes a man stand straight. - Lillian Hellman
For every man there exists a bait which he cannot resist swallowing. - Friedrich Wilhelm Nietzsche
A woman's mind is cleaner than a man's: She changes it more often. - Oliver Herford
The best use of laws is to teach men to trample bad laws under their feet. - Wendell Phillips
Advice is like cooking - you should try it first before you feed it to others. - Unknown
The worst thing about some men is that when they are not drunk they are sober. - William Butler Yeats
The man who smiles when things go wrong has thought of someone to blame it on. - Robert Bloch
A hero is no braver than an ordinary man, but he is braver five minutes longer. - Ralph Waldo Emerson
A truly rich man is one whose children run into his arms when his hands are empty. - Unknown
The price good men pay for indifference to public affairs is to be ruled by evil men. - Plato
I believe in the Providence of the most men, the largest purse, and the longest cannon. - Abraham Lincoln
There is nothing will kill a man so soon as having nobody to find fault with but himself. - George Eliot
When a man has once loved a woman he will do anything for her except continue to love her. - Oscar Wilde
It is easier for a woman to defend her virtue against men than her reputation against women. - French Proverb
A broken heart is a very pleasant complaint for a man in London if he has a comfortable income. - George Bernard Shaw
The one quality that can be developed by studious reflection and practice is the leadership of men. - Dwight D Eisenhower
A blind man can make art if what is in his mind can be passed to another mind in some tangible form. - Sol LeWitt
The man who views the world at fifty the same as he did at twenty has wasted thirty years of his life. - Muhammad Ali
I submit to you that if a man hasn't discovered something he will die for, he isn't fit to live. - Martin Luther King Jr.
Aw, Dad, you've done a lot of great things, but you're a very old man, and old people are useless. - Homer Simpson
Show me a man with both feet firmly on the ground, and I'll show you a man who can't get his pants off. - Unknown
Men prefer brief praise, pitched high; women are satisfied with praise in a lower key, just so it goes on and on - Mignon McLaughlin
What my mother believed about cooking is that if you worked hard and prospered, someone else would do it for you. - Nora Ephron
The great Gaels of Ireland are the men that God made mad.
For all their wars are merry, and all their songs are sad. - G K Chesterton
He who learns the rules of wisdom without conforming to them in his life is like a man who plows in his field but does not sow. - Saadi
In my many years I have come to a conclusion that one useless man is a shame, two is a law firm, and three or more is a congress. - John Adams
An artist is a man of action, whether he creates a personality, invents an expedient, or finds the issue of a complicated situation. - Joseph Conrad
The greatest thing about man is his ability to transcend himself, his ancestry and his environment and to become what he dreams of being. - Tully C. Knoles
Before marriage, a man declares that he would lay down his life to serve you; after marriage, he won't even lay down his newspaper to talk to you. - Helen Rowland
see also Dining, Food & Marriage
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