Tendjewberrymud

Translation 101 for anyone traveling to the Far East


[To get the full effect, this should be read aloud. The following is a telephone exchange between a hotel guest and room-service, at a hotel in Asia, which was recorded and published in the Far East Economic Review. You will understand what 'tendjewberrymud' means by the end of the conversation...]

Room Service (RS): Morny. Ruin sorbees.
Guest (G): Sorry, I thought I dialed room-service.
RS: Rye... Ruin sorbees... morny! Djewish to odor sunteen?
G: Uh... yes... I’d like some bacon and eggs.
RS: Ouw July den?
G: What?
RS: Ouw July den?... pryd, boyd, poochd?
G: Oh, the eggs! How do I like them? Sorry, scrambled please.
RS: Ouw July dee baychem? Crease?
G: Crisp will be fine.
RS: Hokay. An Sahn toes?
G: What?
RS: An toes. July Sahn toes?
G: I don’t think so.
RS: No? Judo sahn toes?
G: I feel really bad about this, but I don’t know what ’judo sahn toes’ means.
RS: Toes! toes!... Why djew Don Juan toes? Ouw bow Anglish moppin we boter?
G: English muffin! I’ve got it! You were saying ‘Toast.’ Fine. Yes, an English muffin will be fine.
RS: We boter?
G: No... just put the boter on the side.
RS: Wad?
G: I mean butter... just put it on the side.
RS: Copy?
G: Sorry?
RS: Copy... tea... mill?
G: Yes. Coffee, please, and that’s all.
RS: One Minnie. Scram egg, crease baychem, Anglish moppin we boter on sigh and copy.... rye?
G: Whatever you say.
RS: Tendjewberrymud.
G: You’re very welcome.





QuotaBills
What's another word for thesaurus? - Steven Wright

Speech is of time; silence is of eternity. - Thomas Carlyle

A proverb is to speech what salt is to food. - Arabic Proverb

I am the Roman Emperor and am above grammar. - Emperor Sigismund

Tears at times have all the weight of speech. - Ovid

A story is told as much by silence as by speech. - Susan Griffin

Synonym Bun: What a thesaurus eats for breakfast - Unknown

I have often regretted my speech, never my silence. - Xenocrates

Well-timed silence hath more eloquence than speech. - Martin Fraquhar Tupper

Free speech is a great idea, but we're in a war. - Lindsey Graham

All poetry is a reproduction of the tones of actual speech. - Robert Frost

Leadership is the capacity to translate vision into reality. - Warren G Bennis

You don't have good grammar when you type with your fists. - C.F. Payne

To a child's ear, 'mother' is magic in any language. - Arlene Benedict

Extremists think 'communication' means agreeing with them. - Leo Rosten

Changes in language often reflect the changing values of a culture. - Ravi Zacharias

Think like a wise man but communicate in the language of the people. - William Butler Yeats

I don't give a damn for a man that can only spell a word one way. - Mark Twain

Laughter is, after speech, the chief thing that holds society together. - Max Eastman

Our waking hours form the text of our lives, our dreams, the commentary. - Unknown

The most beautiful words in the English language are "cheque enclosed". - Dorothy Parker

The language of the law must not be foreign to the ears of those who are to obey it. - Learned hand

Nostalgia is like a grammar lesson: you find the present tense, but the past perfect. - Owens L. Pomeroy

Good communication is as stimulating as black coffee, and just as hard to sleep after. - Anne Morrow Lindbergh

My wife has a slight impediment in her speech. Every now and then she stops to breathe. - Jimmy Durante

Everybody laughs the same in every language because laughter is a universal connection. - Yakov Smirnoff

I never made a mistake in grammar but once in my life, and as soon as I done it. I seen it. - Carl Sandburg

Grammar: the difference between Feeling Your Nuts and Feeling You're Nuts. - Unknown

Officialese: A government language where you can understand the words, but not the sentences - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

In the places I go there are things that I see that I never could spell if I stopped with the Z. - Dr. Seuss

German is the most extravagantly ugly language - it sounds like someone using a sick bag on a 747. - Willy Rushton

Morals are an acquirement - like music, like a foreign language, like piety, poker, paralysis - no man is born with them. - Mark Twain

The nine most terrifying words in the English language are,
"I'm from the government and I'm here to help." - Ronald Reagan

The wise man is but a clever infant, spelling letters from a hieroglyphical prophetic book, the lexicon of which lies in eternity. - Thomas Carlyle

"I am" is reportedly the shortest sentence in the English language. Could it be that "I do" is the longest sentence? - George Carlin

Heard about the young deaf boy who used sign language?
One day he told his mother a dirty joke and she washed his hands out with soap. - Red Skelton

The best managers figure out how to get great outcomes by setting the appropriate context, rather than by trying to control their people. - Reed Hastings

Good content should be at the heart of your strategy, but it is equally important to keep the display context of that content in mind as well. - Tim Frick

I remain convinced that obstinate addiction to ordinary language in our private thoughts is one of the main obstacles to progress in philosophy. - Bertrand Russell

Mathematicians are like Frenchmen: whatever you say to them they translate into their own language and forthwith it is something entirely different. - Johann Wolfgang von Goethe


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31-May-2020