Tendjewberrymud

Translation 101 for anyone traveling to the Far East


[To get the full effect, this should be read aloud. The following is a telephone exchange between a hotel guest and room-service, at a hotel in Asia, which was recorded and published in the Far East Economic Review. You will understand what 'tendjewberrymud' means by the end of the conversation...]

Room Service (RS): Morny. Ruin sorbees.
Guest (G): Sorry, I thought I dialed room-service.
RS: Rye... Ruin sorbees... morny! Djewish to odor sunteen?
G: Uh... yes... I’d like some bacon and eggs.
RS: Ouw July den?
G: What?
RS: Ouw July den?... pryd, boyd, poochd?
G: Oh, the eggs! How do I like them? Sorry, scrambled please.
RS: Ouw July dee baychem? Crease?
G: Crisp will be fine.
RS: Hokay. An Sahn toes?
G: What?
RS: An toes. July Sahn toes?
G: I don’t think so.
RS: No? Judo sahn toes?
G: I feel really bad about this, but I don’t know what ’judo sahn toes’ means.
RS: Toes! toes!... Why djew Don Juan toes? Ouw bow Anglish moppin we boter?
G: English muffin! I’ve got it! You were saying ‘Toast.’ Fine. Yes, an English muffin will be fine.
RS: We boter?
G: No... just put the boter on the side.
RS: Wad?
G: I mean butter... just put it on the side.
RS: Copy?
G: Sorry?
RS: Copy... tea... mill?
G: Yes. Coffee, please, and that’s all.
RS: One Minnie. Scram egg, crease baychem, Anglish moppin we boter on sigh and copy.... rye?
G: Whatever you say.
RS: Tendjewberrymud.
G: You’re very welcome.





QuotaBills
Silence is safer than speech. - Epictetus

Humor is a universal language. - Joel Goodman

Is there another word for synonym? - George Carlin

Fair speech may hide a foul heart. - JRR Tolkien

Speech is silver; silence is golden. - Thomas Carlyle

What's another word for thesaurus? - Steven Wright

I'm a supporter of my free speech. - Howard Stern

Nothing you can't spell will ever work. - Will Rogers

Tears at times have all the weight of speech. - Ovid

What we've got here is a failure to communicate. - Cool Hand Luke

The art of communication is the language of leadership. - James Humes

We now communicate with everyone and say absolutely nothing. - Ted Koppel

I respect a man who knows how to spell a word more than one way. - Mark Twain

I failed kindergarten because I couldn't spell my last name. - Zach Galifianakis

To a child's ear, 'mother' is magic in any language. - Arlene Benedict

Retire? I can't spell the word. I'd play in a wheelchair. - Keith Richards

England and America are two countries separated by a common language. - George Bernard Shaw

The 3 fastest means of communication: Twitter; Telephone; Tell a woman. - Unknown

Our waking hours form the text of our lives, our dreams, the commentary. - Unknown

It usually takes more than three weeks to prepare a good impromptu speech. - Mark Twain

Symptoms are the body's mother tongue; signs are in a foreign language. - John Brown

The most beautiful words in the English language are "cheque enclosed". - Dorothy Parker

If you cannot understand me in my speech, how can you understand me in my silence? - Ravi Zacharias

I personally think we developed language because of our deep inner need to complain. - Jane Wagner

Good communication is as stimulating as black coffee, and just as hard to sleep after. - Anne Morrow Lindbergh

Speak when you're angry and you'll make the best speech you'll ever regret. - L.J. Peter

At no time is freedom of speech more precious than when a man hits his thumb with a hammer. - Marshall Lumsden

Language is our meeting place, the sea we live in... it is the common ground of our humanity. - Toby Wolfe

I want flowers, I don't want to text. What does that make me? What kind of dinosaur am I? - Jennifer Garner

Human language appears to be a unique phenomenon, without significant analogue in the animal world. - Noam Chomsky

Music is the language of the spirit. It opens the secret of life bringing peace, abolishing strife. - Kahlil Gibran

Language, identity, place, home: these are all of a piece - just different elements of belonging and not-belonging. - Jhumpa Lahiri

If the English language made any sense, 'lackadaisical' would have something to do with a shortage of flowers. - Doug Larson

The longest word in the English language is the one following the phrase, "And now a word from our sponsor." - Hal Eaton

Two may talk together under the same roof for many years, yet never really meet; and two others at first speech are old friends. - Mary Catherwood

The Internet is the most important single development in the history of human communication since the invention of call waiting. - Dave Barry

The wise man is but a clever infant, spelling letters from a hieroglyphical prophetic book, the lexicon of which lies in eternity. - Thomas Carlyle

Like a human being, a company has to have an internal communication mechanism, a 'nervous system', to coordinate its actions. - Bill Gates

The best managers figure out how to get great outcomes by setting the appropriate context, rather than by trying to control their people. - Reed Hastings

Good leaders must communicate vision clearly, creatively and continually. However, the vision doesn't come alive until the leader models it. - John C Maxwell


see also   Language  Section
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04-Dec-2020