Tendjewberrymud

Translation 101 for anyone traveling to the Far East


[To get the full effect, this should be read aloud. The following is a telephone exchange between a hotel guest and room-service, at a hotel in Asia, which was recorded and published in the Far East Economic Review. You will understand what 'tendjewberrymud' means by the end of the conversation...]

Room Service (RS): Morny. Ruin sorbees.
Guest (G): Sorry, I thought I dialed room-service.
RS: Rye... Ruin sorbees... morny! Djewish to odor sunteen?
G: Uh... yes... I’d like some bacon and eggs.
RS: Ouw July den?
G: What?
RS: Ouw July den?... pryd, boyd, poochd?
G: Oh, the eggs! How do I like them? Sorry, scrambled please.
RS: Ouw July dee baychem? Crease?
G: Crisp will be fine.
RS: Hokay. An Sahn toes?
G: What?
RS: An toes. July Sahn toes?
G: I don’t think so.
RS: No? Judo sahn toes?
G: I feel really bad about this, but I don’t know what ’judo sahn toes’ means.
RS: Toes! toes!... Why djew Don Juan toes? Ouw bow Anglish moppin we boter?
G: English muffin! I’ve got it! You were saying ‘Toast.’ Fine. Yes, an English muffin will be fine.
RS: We boter?
G: No... just put the boter on the side.
RS: Wad?
G: I mean butter... just put it on the side.
RS: Copy?
G: Sorry?
RS: Copy... tea... mill?
G: Yes. Coffee, please, and that’s all.
RS: One Minnie. Scram egg, crease baychem, Anglish moppin we boter on sigh and copy.... rye?
G: Whatever you say.
RS: Tendjewberrymud.
G: You’re very welcome.





QuotaBills
A riot is the language of the unheard. - Martin Luther King, Jr.

Speech is the small change of silence. - George Meredith

I am disappointment in you're grammar. - Unknown

Speech is of time; silence is of eternity. - Thomas Carlyle

Discretion in speech is more than eloquence. - Francis Bacon

Good sayings are like pearls strung together. - Chinese Proverb

I have often regretted my speech, never my silence. - Xenocrates

Humor is the affectionate communication of insight. - Leo Rosten

Ratify: To use a spell and turn a person into a rodent - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

The art of communication is the language of leadership. - James Humes

Man invented language to satisfy his deep need to complain. - Lily Tomlin

A sage thing is timely silence, and better than any speech. - Plutarch

We are all here for a spell; get all the good laughs you can. - Will Rogers

We need a president who's fluent in at least one language. - Buck Henry

Many attempts to communicate are nullified by saying too much. - Robert Greenleaf

The great myth of our times is that technology is communication. - Libby Larsen

Music is the literature of the heart; it commences where speech ends. - Alphonse de Lamartine

Symptoms are the body's mother tongue; signs are in a foreign language. - John Brown

Sometimes the best communication happens when you're on separate bikes. - Unknown

A bore is one who has the power of speech but not the capacity for conversation. - Benjamin Desraeli

The language of the law must not be foreign to the ears of those who are to obey it. - Learned hand

I am going to give a long speech today. I haven't had time to prepare a short one. - Winston Churchill

Speak when you're angry and you'll make the best speech you'll ever regret. - L.J. Peter

You don't really understand something unless you can communicate it in a simple way. - Albert Einstein

I never made a mistake in grammar but once in my life, and as soon as I done it. I seen it. - Carl Sandburg

The trouble with her is that she lacks the power of conversation but not the power of speech. - George Bernard Shaw

If we do not believe in freedom of speech for those we despise, we do not believe in it at all. - Noam Chomsky

Human language appears to be a unique phenomenon, without significant analogue in the animal world. - Noam Chomsky

Music is the language of the spirit. It opens the secret of life bringing peace, abolishing strife. - Kahlil Gibran

Fashion is free speech, and one of the privileges, if not always one of the pleasures, of a free world. - Alison Lurie

Violence of language leads to violence of action. Angry men seldom fight if their tongues do not lead the fray. - Charles V Roman

To suppress free speech is a double wrong. It violates the rights of the hearer as well as those of the speaker. - Frederick Douglass

A dinosaur out of context is like a character without a story. Worse than that, the character suffers from amnesia. - Jack Horner

The ability to speak several languages is an asset, but the ability to keep your mouth shut in any language is priceless. - Unknown

The symbolic language of the crucifixion is the death of the old paradigm; resurrection is a leap into a whole new way of thinking. - Deepak Chopra

Heard about the young deaf boy who used sign language?
One day he told his mother a dirty joke and she washed his hands out with soap. - Red Skelton

Good leaders must communicate vision clearly, creatively and continually. However, the vision doesn't come alive until the leader models it. - John C Maxwell

Wise sayings are not only for ornament, but for action and business, having a point or edge, whereby knots in business are pierced and discovered. - Francis Bacon

More people watch television and get their information that way than read books. I find new technology and new ways of communication very exciting. - Stephen Covey

Mathematicians are like Frenchmen: whatever you say to them they translate into their own language and forthwith it is something entirely different. - Johann Wolfgang von Goethe


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29-Jun-2022