Understanding Women

Genie in a bottle - one wish 4U...


A man walking along a California beach was deep in prayer. All of a sudden, he said out loud, “Lord grant me one wish.” Suddenly the sky clouded above his head and in a booming voice the Lord said, “Because you have TRIED to be faithful to me in all ways, I will grant you one wish.”

The man said, “Build a bridge to Hawaii so I can drive over anytime I want.”

The Lord said, “Your request is very materialistic. Think of the enormous challenges for that kind of undertaking. The supports required to reach the bottom of the Pacific! The concrete and steel it would take! I can do it, but it is hard for me to justify your desire for worldly things. Take a little more time and think of another wish, a wish you think would honour and glorify me.”

The man thought about it for a long time. Finally he said, “Lord, I wish that I could understand women. I want to know how they feel inside, what they are thinking when they give me the silent treatment, why they cry, what they mean when they say “nothing”, and how I can make a woman truly happy.”

The Lord replied, “You want two lanes or four lanes on that bridge?”


QuotaBills
Civilized humanical relationships - Archie Bunker

Marriage is the chief cause of divorce. - Groucho Marx

Love is blind, but marriage restores its sight. - Georg C. Lichtenberg

Love - a temporary insanity curable by marriage. - Ambrose Bierce

A bachelor is a guy who never made the same mistake once. - Phyllis Diller

There's more to marriage than four bare legs in a bed. - English Proverb

There is no perfect marriage, for there are no perfect men. - French Proverb

Before you marry keep both eyes open; after marriage shut one. - Jamaican Proverb

The more you invest in a marriage, the more valuable it becomes. - Amy Grant

A good marriage would be between a blind wife and a deaf husband. - Ogden Nash

Marriage is but for a little while. It is alimony that is forever. - Quentin Crisp

Real magic in relationships means an absence of judgment of others. - Wayne Dyer

Most women are afraid of clowns, but somehow end up still dating one. - Unknown

There's one thing about a late marriage - it doesn't last long. - Unknown

Marriage, like a submarine, is only safe if you get all the way inside. - Frank Pittman

Marriage requires a special talent like acting. Monogamy requires genius. - Warren Beatty

College is a place to keep warm between high school and an early marriage. - George Gobel

Want to improve your relationships? See love as a verb rather than as a feeling. - Stephen R. Covey

A long marriage is two people trying to dance a duet and two solos at the same time. - Anne Taylor Fleming

Marriage is wonderful institution... if, of course, you like living in an institution. - Groucho Marx

I believe in tying the marriage knot, as long as it's around the woman's neck. - WC Fields

How marriage ruins a man! It is as demoralizing as cigarettes, and far more expensive. - Oscar Wilde

A girl who thinks that a man will treat her better after marriage than before is a fool. - William C. Hall

Our marriage vows: till death do us part, for better for worse, in secrets and in health. - Archie Bunker

Every time I try to make my marriage more exciting, my wife finds out about it right away. - Bob Monkhouse

As a man in a relationship, you have a simple choice: You can be right or you can be happy. - Ralphie May

Men always want to be a woman's first love - women like to be a man's last romance. - Oscar Wilde

The husband who wants a happy marriage should learn to keep his mouth shut and his checkbook open. - Groucho Marx

The key to a long and healthy marriage is that, honestly, there's nothing worth fighting about. - Jay Leno

Marriage is the only known example of the happy meeting of the immovable object and the irresistible force. - Ogden Nash

Remember that your best relationship is one in which your love for each other exceeds your need for each other. - Unknown

Love is an ideal thing, marriage is a real thing. A confusion of the real with the ideal never goes unpunished. - Johann Wolfgang Goethe

Valentine's Day: Rubbing singles' noses in their lack of a mate and the noses of couples in their lack of time. - Emma McLaughlin

It's really hard to maintain a one-on-one relationship if the other person is not going to allow me to be with other people. - Axl Rose

If the marriage needs help, the answer almost always is have more fun. Drop your list of grievances and go ride a roller coaster. - Garrison Keillor

Don't over-analyze your marriage; it's like yanking up a fragile indoor plant every 20 minutes to see how its roots are growing. - Ogden Nash

In every marriage more than a week old, there are grounds for divorce. The trick is to find, and continue to find, grounds for marriage. - Robert Anderson

Some people claim that marriage interferes with romance. There's no doubt about it. Anytime you have a romance, your wife is bound to interfere. - Groucho Marx

One advantage of marriage is that when you fall out of love with him or he falls out of love with you, it keeps you together until you fall in again. - Judith Viorst

Fraud in business is no different from infidelity in marriage or plagiarism in scholarly work. Even people committed to high moral standards succumb. - Miroslav Volf


see also   Genie  &  Relationship  Sections
Understanding Women - Pocket Edition

A Mother’s Love
A Woman’s Mind
Bedside Non-Assistance
Before Online Dating
Everything Men Know About Women
Hormone Guide
Keyboard Wedding
Looking For Your Wife?
Looking Small
Names of the Colours
Real Man’s Point System
Romance Lost
The Origin of the White Wedding Dress
When Men Shop For Groceries
Will To Live
Winning An Argument With A Woman

 

Parking Forever

I've Got Time

Red Wine Diet

Nice Try, Mom

Flight of the Ladybug

Time To Retire

Chess On The Wall

Tree Face

Bad Day Flyer

Back Bard

St. Peter's Fish

Feed Me

Horse Model

Get In Line!

Coffee World
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09-Dec-2019