Cannibalizing The Useful Staff

Corporate Cannibals


A large corporation recently hired several cannibals.

“You are all part of our team now,” said the HR rep during the welcoming briefing. “You get all the usual benefits and you can go to the cafeteria for something to eat, but please - don’t eat any of the other employees.”
The cannibals promised they would not.

Four weeks later their boss remarked, “You’re all working very hard, and I’m satisfied with your work. However, one of our secretaries has disappeared. Do any of you know what happened to her?”

The cannibals all shook their heads no. After the boss had left, the leader of the cannibals said to the others, “Which one of you morons ate the secretary?”

A hand rose hesitantly.

“You fool,” the leader continued. “For four weeks we’ve been eating managers and no one noticed anything. But NO-OOOOO… you had to go and eat someone important!”


QuotaBills
Some leaders are born women. - Unknown

Black Panther leader Elder Cleavage. - Archie Bunker

Joy is the serious business of Heaven. - C S Lewis

Lots of folks confuse bad management with destiny. - Kin Hubbard

About half my time is spent on business operation type stuff. - Mark Zuckerberg

We take the hamburger business more seriously than anyone else. - Ray Kroc

The best leaders not only develop us, they advocate our future. - Michael Dooley

A boss commands, but a leader will always bring a team together. - Unknown

Marketing and innovation are the two chief functions of business. - Peter F Drucker

A true leader is one who is humble enough to admit their mistakes. - Unknown

Philosophy: A route of many roads leading from nowhere to nothing. - Ambrose Bierce

Management is doing things right; leadership is doing the right things. - Peter F Drucker

The value of a leader is directly proportional to that leader's values. - Unknown

There is only one certainty in business: You can't succeed if you quit. - Darren Hardy

Be stubbornly committed to your team, but flexible in your leadership style. - Jo Miller

Leaders don't set out to climb the ladder. They rise by lifting others up. - Jo Miller

A person always doing his or her best becomes a natural leader, just by example. - Joe DiMaggio

Whenever you see a successful business, someone once made a courageous decision. - Peter F Drucker

Great leaders don't set out to be leaders. They set out to make a difference. - Jeremy Bravo

I started the site when I was 19. I didn't know much about business back then. - Mark Zuckerberg

Vanity can create a very cruel space for you if you don't know how to manage it. - Lady Gaga

Make it thy business to know thyself, which is the most difficult lesson in the world. - Sir William Temple

Our business in life is not to get ahead of other people, but to get ahead of ourselves. - Maltbie D. Matlock

Good leaders do not take on all the work themselves; neither do they take all the credit. - Unknown

Everybody's business is nobody's business, and nobody's business is my business. - Clara Barton

Good leaders develop ideas. Great leaders develop people. The best leaders develop new leaders. - Bobby Umar

Business is a sprint until you find an opportunity, then it's the patience of a marathon runner. - Robert Herjavec

If the government was as afraid of disturbing the consumer as it is of disturbing business, this would be some democracy. - Kin Hubbard

Philanthropy without scale and sustainability is like any other bad business that will simply wither and die on the vine. - Naveen Jain

Doing business without advertising is like winking at a girl in the dark. You know what you are doing, but nobody else does. - Stuart H Britt

It is very vulgar to talk about one's business. Only people like stockbrokers do that, and then merely at dinner parties. - Oscar Wilde

Business meetings are important because they're one way of demonstrating how many people the company can operate without. - Unknown

Before you are a leader, success is all about growing yourself. When you become a leader, success is all about growing others. - Jack Welch

I have made the tough decisions, always with an eye toward the bottom line. Perhaps it's time America was run like a business. - Donald Trump

Employers and business leaders need people who can think for themselves - who can take initiative and be the solution to problems. - Stephen Covey

The insight to see possible new paths, the courage to try them, the judgment to measure results - these are the qualities of a leader. - Mary Parker Follett

A leader takes people where they want to go. A great leader takes people where they don't necessarily want to go, but ought to be. - Rosalyn Carter

He's ... probably the greatest corporate leader in the history of a major company... Somebody like that would be absolutely incredible. - Donald Trump

Leadership is a matter of having people look at you and gain confidence, seeing how you react. If you're in control, they're in control. - Tom Landry

In the past a leader was a boss. Today's leaders must be partners with their people; they no longer can lead solely based on positional power. - Ken Blanchard


see also   Business  Section
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College in a Nutshell
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Leading a Remote Life
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17-May-2022