Little Johnny watched the science teacher start an experiment with worms.
Four worms were placed into four separate jars:
The first worm was put into a jar of alcohol.
The second worm was put into a jar of cigarette smoke.
The third worm was put into a jar of sperm.
The fourth worm was put into a jar of soil.
After one day, these were the results:
The first worm in alcohol - dead.
Second worm in cigarette smoke - dead.
Third worm in sperm - dead.
Fourth worm in soil - alive.
So the Science teacher asked the class, “What can you learn from this experiment?”
Little Johnny quickly raised his hand and said, “As long as you drink, smoke and have sex, you won’t have worms.”
To teach is to learn twice. - Joseph Joubert
Learn what you are and be such. - Pindar
We can only learn to love by loving. - Iris Murdoch
Every runner is an experiment of one. - George Sheehan
Astrology is a disease, not a science. - Maimonides
The wisest mind has something yet to learn. - George Santanaya
Learn to let go. That is the key to happiness. - Buddha
Thought, unassisted by learning, is dangerous. - Confucius
When the student is ready, the teacher will appear. - Buddha
Life can be fun if you learn to enjoy the adventure. - Unknown
If you learn from defeat, you haven't really lost. - Zig Ziglar
Books have led some to learning and others to madness. - Petrarch
When I die, I'm leaving my body to science fiction. - Steven Wright
The early bird gets the worm. The early worm gets eaten. - Norman Augustine
You ain't gonna learn what you don't wanna know. - Jerry Garcia
Let the others have the charisma. I've got the class. - George H.W. Bush
It was so hot today I saw a robin dipping his worm in Nestea. - Johnny Carson
He who has imagination without learning, has wings and no feet. - Joseph Joubert
I realized my mission in life was to learn more, not earn more. - Surya Das
Learn to value yourself, which means: fight for your happiness. - Ayn Rand
Education: the path from cocky ignorance to miserable uncertainty. - Mark Twain
Science is a differential equation. Religion is a boundary condition. - Alan Turing
Live as if you were to die tomorrow. Learn as if you were to live forever. - Mahatma Gandhi
The most important thing in life is to learn how to give out love, and let it come in. - Morrie Schwartz
We learn the most from imperfect relationships - things like forgiveness and compassion. - Andrea Thompson
There are no mistakes, no coincidences. All events are blessings given to us to learn from. - Elizabeth Kubler-Ross
You have to learn the rules of the game. And then you have to play better than anyone else. - Unknown
Everyone should experience defeat at least once during their career. You learn a lot from it. - Lou Holtz
A weed is a plant that has mastered every survival skill except for learning how to grow in rows. - Doug Larson
If a young person has any idealism at all, it's strongest about the time he finishes college. - Sargent Shriver
Football: A sport that bears the same relation to education that bullfighting does to agriculture - Daffynitions joe-ks.com
I think every day is Groundhog's Day. I get to learn from my mistakes and be better every day. - Ashton Kutcher
If your actions inspire others to dream more, learn more, do more and become more, you are a leader. - John Quincy Adams
Bring me a worm that can comprehend a man, and then I will show you a man who can comprehend the triune God. - John Wesley
I keep looking for one more teacher, only to find that fish learn from the water and birds learn from the sky. - Mark Nepo
If you learn to listen for clues as to how I feel instead of what I say, you will be able to understand me much better. - Mara Botonis
It does not make any difference how beautiful your guess is if it disagrees with experiment it is wrong. That is all there is to it. - Richard P Feynman
If I had thought about it, I wouldn't have done the experiment. The literature was full of examples that said you can't do this. - Spencer Silver
Learning to play golf is like learning to play the violin. It's not only difficult to do, it's very painful to everyone around you. - Hal Linden
In learning to know other things, and other minds, we become more intimately acquainted with ourselves, and are to ourselves better worth knowing. - Philip Gilbert Hamilton
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