Never Underestimate The Power of Seniors

If you’re going to have a Senior Moment, make it memorable


[This is a true account as recorded in the Police Log of Sarasota, Florida…]

An elderly Florida lady did her shopping and, upon returning to her car, found four males in the act of leaving with her vehicle. She dropped her shopping bags and drew her handgun, proceeding to scream at the top of her voice: “I have a gun, and I know how to use it.  Get out of the car!”

The four men didn’t wait for a second invitation. They got out and ran like mad. The lady, somewhat shaken, then proceeded to load her shopping bags into the back of the car and got into the driver’s seat. She was so shaken that she could not get her key into the ignition. She tried and tried, and then it dawned on her why - for the same reason she did not understand why there was a football, a frisbee and two 12 packs in the front seat... A few minutes later, she found her own car parked four or five spaces farther down.

She loaded her bags into the car and drove to the police station to report her mistake. The sergeant to whom she told the story couldn’t stop laughing. He pointed to the other end of the counter, where four pale men were reporting a car jacking by a mad, elderly woman described as white, less than five feet tall, glasses, curly white hair, and carrying a large handgun. No charges were filed.




QuotaBills
Stress makes you stupid. - Unknown

Old age comes at a bad time. - Sue Banducci

Old age is the verdict of life. - Amelia E Barr

Aging wrinkles the body. Quitting wrinkles the soul. - Douglas MacArthur

Old age is not so bad when you consider the alternative. - Maurice Chevalier

I know I can't cheat death, but I can cheat old age. - Darwin Deason

If youth had but the knowledge and old age the strength. - French Proverb

Fourty is the old age of youth; 50 is the youth of old age. - Victor Hugo

I'm aging like fine wine. I'm getting complex and fruity. - Unknown

Never have I enjoyed youth so thoroughly as I have in my old age. - George Santayana

We must have a pie. Stress cannot exist in the presence of a pie. - David Mamet

Reality: The leading cause of stress among those in touch with it. - Lily Tomlin

Too much homework can cause stress, depression and even lower grades. - Unknown

The tragedy of old age is not that one is old, but that one is young. - Oscar Wilde

In youth we run into difficulties; in old age difficulties run into us. - Josh Billings

Young men soon give, and soon forget, affronts; old age is slow in both. - Joseph Addison

Stress is nothing more than a socially acceptable form of mental illness. - Richard Carlson

Stress is an ignorant state. It believes that everything is an emergency. - Natalie Goldberg

God will never give you anything you can't handle, so don't stress. - Kelly Clarkson

The key to successful aging is to pay as little attention to it as possible. - Judith Regan

Retirement means no pressure, no stress, no heartache... unless you play golf. - Gene Perret

Old age takes away what we've inherited and gives us what we've earned. - Gerald Brenan

Those who love deeply never grow old; they may die of old age, but they die young. - Dorothy Canfield Fisher

Stress depletes willpower, which diminishes your ability to control those emotions. - Roy F Baumeister

There is no pleasure worth forgoing just for an extra three years in the geriatric ward. - John Mortimer

We could certainly slow the aging process down if it had to work its way through Congress. - Will Rogers

Stress exacerbates any problem, whether it's diabetes, heart trouble, MS, or whatever. - Mary Ann Mobley

Aging is the extraordinary process where you become the person you always should have been. - David Bowie

My comfort is, that old age, that ill layer-up of beauty, can do no more spoil upon my face. - William Shakespeare

The toilets at a local police station have been stolen. Police say they have nothing to go on. - Ronnie Corbett

Old age is like a plane flying through a storm. Once you are aboard, there is nothing you can do. - Golda Meir

There are only three things that can kill a farmer: lightning, rolling over in a tractor, and old age. - Bill Bryson

The elderly don't drive that badly; they're just the only ones with time to do the speed limit. - Jason Love

In youth the days are short and the years are long; in old age the years are short and the days are long. - Nikita I Panin

When it comes to old age we're all in the same boat, only some of us have been aboard a little longer. - Leo Probst

I'm learning in my old age that the only thing you can do to keep your sanity is to stay in the moment. - Willem Dafoe

Autumn is really the best of the seasons; and I'm not sure that old age isn't the best part of life. - C S Lewis

In old age we are like a batch of letters that someone has sent. We are no longer in the post, we have arrived. - Knut Hamsun

I have this theory that chocolate slows down the aging process. It may not be true, but do I dare take the chance? - Unknown

Not one of them who took up in his youth with his opinion that there are no gods ever continued until old age faithful to his conviction. - Plato


see also   Aging  &  Police  Sections
Aging Cyclist
Aging Mermaid
Bird Walker
Boy Scout Scooter
Camel Walkers
Cold One
Dance While You Can
Dear Crossing
Elderly Rocker
Florida’s Retired Bikers
Grandma’s Controller
Harley Half Ton
iPhone Dock
It’s Never Too Late, Harley
Jogging Bike
Just Like Grandpa
Newfie Senior Scooter
Once A Kid, Always A Kid
Onward, My Noble Steed!
Racing Grandpa
Scooter Down
Scooter Duo
Scooter Races
Seatbelt Extender
Senior’s Paddle Surfboard
Snow Tires for Seniors
Treadmill Workout
Walker Buddies

 

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Pentecost Sunday

Nun Chairs - Great Looking Legs

Organ Donor

Moldy Bible

Gyprock Prayer

Barn Art

Submarine Tea

NAACP Cover Up

Quad Shot

Princess Parking

Restaurant Wait-er

How Much Is That Doggie In The Window?

Butterfly Lens

Pike Mouth Nest

Improvise, Adapt, Overcome

Flower Lips

Bird Walker

Never Go Full Retard

Multi-Pilot Jet
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31-May-2020