Never Underestimate The Power of Seniors

If you’re going to have a Senior Moment, make it memorable


[This is a true account as recorded in the Police Log of Sarasota, Florida…]

An elderly Florida lady did her shopping and, upon returning to her car, found four males in the act of leaving with her vehicle. She dropped her shopping bags and drew her handgun, proceeding to scream at the top of her voice: “I have a gun, and I know how to use it.  Get out of the car!”

The four men didn’t wait for a second invitation. They got out and ran like mad. The lady, somewhat shaken, then proceeded to load her shopping bags into the back of the car and got into the driver’s seat. She was so shaken that she could not get her key into the ignition. She tried and tried, and then it dawned on her why - for the same reason she did not understand why there was a football, a frisbee and two 12 packs in the front seat... A few minutes later, she found her own car parked four or five spaces farther down.

She loaded her bags into the car and drove to the police station to report her mistake. The sergeant to whom she told the story couldn’t stop laughing. He pointed to the other end of the counter, where four pale men were reporting a car jacking by a mad, elderly woman described as white, less than five feet tall, glasses, curly white hair, and carrying a large handgun. No charges were filed.




QuotaBills
Old age is life's parody. - Simone de Beauvoir

Cherish youth, but trust old age. - Pueblo Proverb

I'm not aging, I'm marinating. - Unknown

Old age is always 15 years older than I am. - Bernard Baruch

Old age is like underwear, it creeps up on you. - Unknown

If youth had but the knowledge and old age the strength. - French Proverb

Memorial services are the cocktail parties of the geriatric set. - Ralph Richardson

Old age is the most unexpected of all things that happen to a man. - Leon Trotsky

I don't own a camera, so I travel with a police sketch artist. - George Carlin

Man fools himself. He prays for a long life, and he fears an old age. - Chinese Proverb

The tragedy of old age is not that one is old, but that one is young. - Oscar Wilde

Old age at least gives me an excuse for not being very good at things. - Thomas Sowell

It is a lot harder now to be a police officer than what it used to be. - Steven Seagal

Stress is an important dragon to slay - or at least tame - in your life. - Marilu Henner

Stress is nothing more than a socially acceptable form of mental illness. - Richard Carlson

A diamond is just a piece of coal that handles stress exceptionally well. - Unknown

Retirement means no pressure, no stress, no heartache... unless you play golf. - Gene Perret

How incessant and great are the ills with which a prolonged old age is replete. - C S Lewis

Old age is like everything else. To make a success of it, you've got to start young. - Fred Astaire

There is no pleasure worth forgoing just for an extra three years in the geriatric ward. - John Mortimer

We could certainly slow the aging process down if it had to work its way through Congress. - Will Rogers

My comfort is, that old age, that ill layer-up of beauty, can do no more spoil upon my face. - William Shakespeare

There's only two people in your life you should lie to... the police and your girlfriend. - Jack Nicholson

Old age has its pleasures, which, though different, are not less than the pleasures of youth. - W Somerset Maugham

The toilets at a local police station have been stolen. Police say they have nothing to go on. - Ronnie Corbett

A man has reached middle age when he is warned to slow down by his doctor instead of the police. - Unknown

The police feel that most of the public are against them and that there is a lot of bad feeling. - Peter James

A police force, wherever they are, is made up of amazing people, and I respect them a great deal. - Nancy McKeon

When grace is joined with wrinkles, it is adorable. There is an unspeakable dawn in happy old age. - Victor Hugo

To keep the heart unwrinkled, to be hopeful, kindly, cheerful, reverent - that is to triumph over old age. - Thomas Bailey Aldrich

I'm learning in my old age that the only thing you can do to keep your sanity is to stay in the moment. - Willem Dafoe

Autumn is really the best of the seasons; and I'm not sure that old age isn't the best part of life. - C S Lewis

The secret of genius is to carry the spirit of the child into old age, which means never losing your enthusiasm. - Aldous Huxley

I have this theory that chocolate slows down the aging process. It may not be true, but do I dare take the chance? - Unknown

May you keep dreaming until the day you die. May imagination overtake memory. May you die young at a ripe old age. - Mark Batterson

I'm being kidnapped by a comforter, sheet and pillow. No need to call the police for I will be released by morning. - Unknown

Animals are not our selfie props. If there's any risk that your photo is going to hurt or stress an animal, it's not worth it. - Angela Henderson

Keep your sense of humor. There's enough stress in the rest of your life to let bad shots ruin a game you're supposed to enjoy. - Amy Alcott

Old age has a great sense of calm and freedom. When the passions have relaxed their hold you have escaped, not from one master, but from many. - Plato

When you have police officers who abuse citizens, you erode public confidence in law enforcement. That makes the job of good police officers unsafe. - Mary F Berry


see also   Aging  &  Police  Sections
Aging Cyclist
Aging Mermaid
Bird Walker
Boy Scout Scooter
Camel Walkers
Cold One
Dance While You Can
Dear Crossing
Elderly Rocker
Florida’s Retired Bikers
Grandma’s Controller
Harley Half Ton
iPhone Dock
It’s Never Too Late, Harley
Jogging Bike
Just Like Grandpa
Newfie Senior Scooter
Once A Kid, Always A Kid
Onward, My Noble Steed!
Racing Grandpa
Scooter Down
Scooter Duo
Scooter Races
Seatbelt Extender
Senior’s Paddle Surfboard
Snow Tires for Seniors
Treadmill Workout
Walker Buddies

 

Snow Barrier

2021 Hooters Owl and Birds of Prey Calendars

Buddhist Tempull

Truck Lift Repair

In-Spired Safety Tip

Secruity Parking Spot

Only In Thailand - Time To Clean The Pet Snake

Remote Outdoors

Scaffolding for the Dirt Cheap Contractor

Fix It Later Detour

I Smell A Rat

Adhesive Shade

Be Anything You Want

Tractor Pull

Canadian Ice Shrub

I Eat Soldiers For Breakfast

Toepener

No-Lake Picture

Logging Chairlift

Milkshake Desweetener
Full list of creditsFacebookTwitterDiggStumbleUponDelicious

30-Nov-2020