[Since the Pledge of Allegiance & The Lord’s Prayer are not allowed in most public schools anymore because the word “God” is mentioned... kids in Arizona wrote the following “NEW” School prayer...]
Now I sit me down in school
Where praying is against the rule
For this great nation under God
Finds mention of Him very odd.
If Scripture now the class recites,
It violates the Bill of Rights.
And anytime my head I bow
Becomes a Federal matter now.
Our hair can be purple, orange or green,
That’s no offense; it’s a freedom scene.
The law is specific, the law is precise.
Prayers spoken aloud are a serious vice.
For praying in a public hall
Might offend someone with no faith at all.
In silence alone we must meditate,
God’s name is prohibited by the state.
We’re allowed to cuss and dress like freaks,
And pierce our noses, tongues and cheeks.
They’ve outlawed guns, but “FIRST” the Bible.
To quote the Good Book, makes me liable.
We can elect a pregnant Senior Queen,
And the “unwed daddy,” our Senior King.
It’s “inappropriate” to teach right from wrong,
We’re taught that such “judgments” don’t belong.
We can get our condoms and birth controls,
Study witchcraft, vampires and totem poles.
But the Ten Commandments aren’t allowed,
No word of God must reach this crowd.
It’s scary here I must confess,
When chaos reigns the school’s a mess.
So, Lord, this silent plea I make:
Should I be shot; My soul please take!
God is love, but get it in writing. - Gypsy Rose Lee
Religions change; beer and wine remain. - Hervey Allen
Black holes are where God divided by zero. - Steven Wright
One filled with joy preaches without preaching. - Mother Teresa
We steal if we touch tomorrow. It is God's. - Henry Ward Beecher
When God sneezed, I didn't know what to say. - Henny Youngman
Humankind's ladder to God is a ladder of deeds. - Sholem Asch
Pray for the dead and fight like hell for the living. - Mother Jones
I would believe only in a God that knows how to dance. - Friedrich Wilhelm Nietzsche
The heart that is generous and kind most resembles God. - Robert Burns
If you want to make God laugh, tell him about your plans. - Woody Allen
If you want to give God a good laugh, tell Him your plans. - Yiddish Proverb
I am the vessel. The draft is God's. And God is the thirsty one. - Dag Hammarskjold
God doesn't require us to succeed; he only requires that you try. - Mother Teresa
Science is a differential equation. Religion is a boundary condition. - Alan Turing
I don't want to send them to jail. I want to send them to school. - Adlai Stevenson
There is a world of practical religion in simply being considerate of others. - Roger Babson
I may not be where I need to be but I thank God I'm not where I used to be! - Joyce Meyer
Let evil swiftly befall those who have wrongly condemned us - God will avenge us. - Jacques de Molay
You don't choose your family. They are God's gift to you, as you are to them. - Desmond Tutu
I'm a Catholic deer hunter. I am happy to be clinging to my guns and my religion. - Paul Ryan
All of us are guinea pigs in the laboratory of God. Humanity is just a work in progress. - Tennessee Williams
I'm not normally a praying man, but if you're up there, please save me, Superman! - Homer Simpson
Canada is founded upon principles that recognize the supremacy of God and the rule of law. - Stockwell Day
They went into my closets looking for skeletons, but thank God, all they found were shoes. - Imelda Marcos
Do not blame God for having created the tiger, but thank him for not having given it wings. - Indian Proverb
Where there is hatred, let me sow love. Where there is injury, pardon. Where there is doubt, faith. - Saint Francis of Assisi
Deep down in me I knowed it was a lie, and He knowed it. You can't pray a lie - I found that out. - Mark Twain
When I make a vow to God, then I would suggest to you that's even stronger than a handshake in Texas. - Rick Perry
Family, religion, friendship... these are the three demons you must slay if you wish to succeed in business. - Mr. Burns
What if the kid you bullied at school, grew up, and turned out to be the only surgeon who could save your life? - Lynette Mather
It ain't those parts of the Bible that I can't understand that bother me, it is the parts that I do understand. - Mark Twain
A burrito is a delicious food item that breaks down all social barriers and leads to temporary spiritual enlightenment. - Lisi Harrison
The trained nurse has become one of the great blessings of humanity, taking a place beside the physician and the priest. - William Osler
But who prays for Satan? Who, in eighteen centuries, has had the common humanity to pray for the one sinner that needed it most? - Mark Twain
If I'm losing balance in a pose, I stretch higher and God reaches down to steady me. It works every time, and not just in yoga. - T. Guillemets
When you die, God and the angels will hold you accountable for all the pleasures you were allowed in this life that you denied yourself. - Unknown
People are so shocked when they find... out I am Protestant. I am Presbyterian. And I go to church, and I love God, and I love my church. - Donald Trump
Happiness cannot be traveled to, owned, earned, or worn. It is the spiritual experience of living every minute with love, grace & gratitude. - Denis Waitley
God, grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, the courage to change the things I can, and the wisdom to know the difference. - Reinhold Niebuhr
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An Evening Prayer
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Day of Light and Darkness
Dead Sea Fish
Equal Rights Church
For Your Synths
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Job Interview With God
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Letters to God - From Children
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The Eye of God
The Very First King Size Bed
Wash Away Sins
Mounted Deer Antlers
Two Feet of Snow in Seattle
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Walking The Dog
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