Barry and Joe were sitting in a Mexican restaurant.
“Barry,” asked Joe, “are there any Jews in Mexico?”
“I don’t know,” Barry replied. “Why don’t we ask the waiter?”
When the waiter came by, Joe asked him, “Are there any Mexican Jews?”
“I don’t know, senor, let me ask,” the waiter replied, and he went into the kitchen.
He returned in a few minutes and said, “No, sir. No Mexican Jews.”
“Are you sure?” Joe asked.
“I will check again, senor.” the waiter replied and went back to the kitchen.
While he was gone, Barry said, “I cannot believe there are no Jews in Mexico. Our people are scattered everywhere.”
When the waiter returned he said, “Senor, no Mexican Jews.”
“Are you really sure?” Joe asked again. “I cannot believe there are no Mexican Jews.”
“Senor, I ask everyone,” the waiter replied, exasperated. “We have orange Jews, prune Jews, tomato Jews and grape Jews, but no one ever hear of Mexican Jews.”
It's okay to play with your food. - Emeril Lagasse
In Mexico we have a word for sushi: Bait. - Jose Simon
The best food is whatever fills the belly. - Arab Proverb
People will travel anywhere for good food. - Rene Redzepi
Queuing tips for fans: wrap up and bring food! - Niall Horan
You don't need a silver fork to eat good food. - Paul Prudhomme
Food is our common ground, a universal experience. - James Beard
I have a great relationship with the Mexican people. - Donald Trump
Jesus was a Jew, yes, but only on his mother's side. - Archie Bunker
If I have one addiction in life, it's probably food. - Liam Hemsworth
Jello: The only food your husband has ever learned to cook - Daffynitions joe-ks.com
A meal of bread, cheese, and beer constitutes the perfect food. - Queen Elizabeth I
Food for the body is not enough. There must be food for the soul. - Dorothy Day
The rich would have to eat money if the poor did not provide food. - Russia Proverb
Her face looked like something on the menu in a seafood restaurant. - Woody Allen
I won't be impressed with technology until I can download food. - Unknown
The soup is never hot enough if the waiter can keep his thumb in it. - William Collier
If you are looking for a fly in your food, it means that you are full. - South Africa Proverb
Your food is close to your stomach, but you must put it in your mouth first. - African Saying
There are only three things women need in life: food, water, and compliments. - Chris Rock
What else is there to live for? Chinese food and women. There is nothing else! - Dudley Moore
We need more young people involved in farming because the future needs real food. - Helena Sylvester
On the Continent people have good food; in England people have good table manners. - George Mikes
So long as you have food in your mouth, you have solved all questions for the time being. - Franz Kafka
Thank you, horseradish, for being neither a radish nor a horse. What you are is a liar food. - Jimmy Fallon
The trouble with eating Italian food is that five or six days later, you're hungry again. - George Miller
If more of us valued food and cheer and song above hoarded gold, it would be a merrier world. - JRR Tolkien
Cajun is country food by farmers and fisherman that arrived in Louisiana from Acadiana, Canada. - Paul Prudhomme
If we're not willing to settle for junk living, we certainly shouldn't settle for junk food. - Sally Edwards
Love, like a chicken salad or restaurant hash, must be taken with blind faith or it loses its flavor. - Helen Rowland
I asked the waiter, "Is this milk fresh?" He said, "Lady, three hours ago it was grass." - Phyllis Diller
If music be the food of love, play on, give me excess of it; that surfeiting, the appetite may sicken, and so die. - William Shakespeare
I went to a restaurant that serves "breakfast at any time". So I ordered French Toast during the Renaissance. - Steven Wright
Every time you use the word 'healthy,' you lose. The key is to make yummy, delicious food that happens to be healthy. - Marcus Samuelsson
In Mexico, an air-conditioner is called a "politician" because it makes a lot of noise but doesn't work very well. - Len Deighton
Reminds me of my safari in Africa. Somebody forgot the corkscrew and for several days we had to live on nothing but food and water. - WC Fields
Two times a week, we go to a nice restaurant, have a little beverage, good food and companionship.
She goes on Tuesdays, I go on Fridays. - Red Skelton
How is it that mercury is not safe for food additives and Over the Counter drug products, but it is safe in our vaccines and dental amalgams? - Dan Burton
I'll paddle board, swim in the ocean, roll in the sand, soak up the sun, eat good food, be with friends and family and go fishing with my dad. - Behati Prinsloo
Cannibal: 1. One who is fed up with people; 2. A person who walks into a restaurant and orders a waiter; 3. One who loves his fellow man with gravy. - Daffynitions joe-ks.com
In Mexico we have a word for sushi: Bait. - Jose Simon
The best food is whatever fills the belly. - Arab Proverb
People will travel anywhere for good food. - Rene Redzepi
Queuing tips for fans: wrap up and bring food! - Niall Horan
You don't need a silver fork to eat good food. - Paul Prudhomme
Food is our common ground, a universal experience. - James Beard
I have a great relationship with the Mexican people. - Donald Trump
Jesus was a Jew, yes, but only on his mother's side. - Archie Bunker
If I have one addiction in life, it's probably food. - Liam Hemsworth
Jello: The only food your husband has ever learned to cook - Daffynitions joe-ks.com
A meal of bread, cheese, and beer constitutes the perfect food. - Queen Elizabeth I
Food for the body is not enough. There must be food for the soul. - Dorothy Day
The rich would have to eat money if the poor did not provide food. - Russia Proverb
Her face looked like something on the menu in a seafood restaurant. - Woody Allen
I won't be impressed with technology until I can download food. - Unknown
The soup is never hot enough if the waiter can keep his thumb in it. - William Collier
If you are looking for a fly in your food, it means that you are full. - South Africa Proverb
Your food is close to your stomach, but you must put it in your mouth first. - African Saying
There are only three things women need in life: food, water, and compliments. - Chris Rock
What else is there to live for? Chinese food and women. There is nothing else! - Dudley Moore
We need more young people involved in farming because the future needs real food. - Helena Sylvester
On the Continent people have good food; in England people have good table manners. - George Mikes
So long as you have food in your mouth, you have solved all questions for the time being. - Franz Kafka
Thank you, horseradish, for being neither a radish nor a horse. What you are is a liar food. - Jimmy Fallon
The trouble with eating Italian food is that five or six days later, you're hungry again. - George Miller
If more of us valued food and cheer and song above hoarded gold, it would be a merrier world. - JRR Tolkien
Cajun is country food by farmers and fisherman that arrived in Louisiana from Acadiana, Canada. - Paul Prudhomme
If we're not willing to settle for junk living, we certainly shouldn't settle for junk food. - Sally Edwards
Love, like a chicken salad or restaurant hash, must be taken with blind faith or it loses its flavor. - Helen Rowland
I asked the waiter, "Is this milk fresh?" He said, "Lady, three hours ago it was grass." - Phyllis Diller
If music be the food of love, play on, give me excess of it; that surfeiting, the appetite may sicken, and so die. - William Shakespeare
I went to a restaurant that serves "breakfast at any time". So I ordered French Toast during the Renaissance. - Steven Wright
Every time you use the word 'healthy,' you lose. The key is to make yummy, delicious food that happens to be healthy. - Marcus Samuelsson
In Mexico, an air-conditioner is called a "politician" because it makes a lot of noise but doesn't work very well. - Len Deighton
Reminds me of my safari in Africa. Somebody forgot the corkscrew and for several days we had to live on nothing but food and water. - WC Fields
Two times a week, we go to a nice restaurant, have a little beverage, good food and companionship.
She goes on Tuesdays, I go on Fridays. - Red Skelton
How is it that mercury is not safe for food additives and Over the Counter drug products, but it is safe in our vaccines and dental amalgams? - Dan Burton
I'll paddle board, swim in the ocean, roll in the sand, soak up the sun, eat good food, be with friends and family and go fishing with my dad. - Behati Prinsloo
Cannibal: 1. One who is fed up with people; 2. A person who walks into a restaurant and orders a waiter; 3. One who loves his fellow man with gravy. - Daffynitions joe-ks.com
see also Dining, Food & Political Sections
Mexico Earthquake - the World Helps Out
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 Pedal Operated Washing Machine |  Just Chillin' Out |  Bee Prepared |  Work Siesta |  Cold Books |
 Zebra Keyboard |  Sing It Out |  Cold One |  Cheerful Trees |  Rooftop Steps |
03-Mar-2021 |