Rools Four Righters

If yore a groan reader, this is 4U & Jethro


 1.. Verbs HAS to agree with their subjects.
 2.. Prepositions are not words to end sentences with.
 3.. And don’t start a sentence with a conjunction.
 4.. It is wrong to ever split an infinitive.
 5.. Avoid clichés like the plague. (They’re old hat)
 6.. Also, always avoid annoying alliteration.
 7.. Be more or less specific.
 8.. Parenthetical remarks (however relevant) are (usually) unnecessary.
 9.. Also too, never, ever use repetitive redundancies.
10.. No sentence fragments.
11.. Contractions aren’t necessary and shouldn’t be used.
12.. Foreign words and phrases are not apropos.
13.. Do not be redundant; do not use more words than necessary; it’s highly superfluous.
14.. One should NEVER generalize.
15.. Comparisons are as bad as clichés.
16.. Don’t use no double negatives.
17.. Eschew ampersands & abbreviations, etc.
18.. One-word sentences? Eliminate.
19.. Analogies in writing are like feathers on a snake.
20.. The passive voice is to be ignored.
21.. Eliminate commas, that are, not necessary. Parenthetical words however should be enclosed in commas.
22.. Never use a big word when a diminutive one would suffice.
23.. Kill all exclamation points!!!
24.. Use words correctly, irregardless of how others use them.
25.. Understatement is always the absolute best way to put forth earth-shaking ideas.
26.. Use the apostrophe in it’s proper place and omit it when its not needed.
27.. Eliminate quotations. As Ralph Waldo Emerson said, “I hate quotations. Tell me what you know.”
28.. If you’ve heard it once, you’ve heard it a thousand times: Resist hyperbole. Not one writer in a million can use it correctly.
29.. Puns are for children, not groan readers.
30.. Go around the barn at high noon to avoid colloquialisms.
31.. Even if a mixed metaphor sings, it should be derailed.
32.. Who needs rhetorical questions?
33.. Exaggeration is a billion times worse than understatement. And finally...
34.. Proofread carefully to see if you any words out.


QuotaBills
A riot is the language of the unheard. - Martin Luther King, Jr.

Poetry is what gets lost in translation. - Robert Frost

I am disappointment in you're grammar. - Unknown

You want to invent new ideas, not new rules. - Dan Heath

I am the Roman Emperor and am above grammar. - Emperor Sigismund

I have often regretted my speech, never my silence. - Xenocrates

The Golden Rule has no place in a political campaign. - John J Ingalls

I make it a rule never to smoke while I'm sleeping. - Mark Twain

Temptations come, as a general rule, when they are sought. - Margaret Oliphant

All poetry is a reproduction of the tones of actual speech. - Robert Frost

Leadership is the capacity to translate vision into reality. - Warren G Bennis

You're not a star until they can spell your name in Karachi. - Humphrey Bogart

Rules of society are nothing; one's conscience is the umpire. - Madame Dudevant

Laws are not masters but servants, and he rules them who obeys them. - Henry Ward Beecher

Men are governed only by serving them; the rule is without exception. - V. Cousin

If you're a good numbers person, you're a bad language person. - Frank Luntz

Our waking hours form the text of our lives, our dreams, the commentary. - Unknown

Dreams say what they mean, but they don't say it in daytime language. - Gail Godwin

I believe in rules. If there weren't any rules, how could you break them? - Leo Durocher

The first 40 years of life give us the text; the next 30 supply the commentary. - Arthur Schopenhauer

Under all speech that is good for anything there lies a silence that is better. - Thomas Carlyle

No one has a finer command of language than the person who keeps his mouth shut. - Sam Rayburn

The best rule of friendship is to keep your heart a little softer than your head. - Unknown

The most beautiful words in the English language are "cheque enclosed". - Dorothy Parker

A synonym is a word you use when you can't spell the first word you thought of. - Burt Bacharach

Actions, looks, words and steps form the alphabet by which you may spell character. - Johann Kasper Lavater

We can let circumstances rule us, or we can take charge and rule our lives from within. - Earl Nightingale

Everybody laughs the same in every language because laughter is a universal connection. - Yakov Smirnoff

I got a simple rule about everybody. If you don’t treat me right – shame on you. - Louis Armstrong

Grammar, which knows how to lord it over kings, and with high hands makes them obey its laws. - Moliere

German is the most extravagantly ugly language - it sounds like someone using a sick bag on a 747. - Willy Rushton

You're an old-timer if you can remember when setting the world on fire was a figure of speech. - Franklin P Jones

Music is the language of the spirit. It opens the secret of life bringing peace, abolishing strife. - Kahlil Gibran

Although he tortures the English language, he has not yet succeeded in forcing it to reveal its meaning. - J B Morton

Things that aren't important, that have nothing to do with winning and losing, don't have to be a rule. - Peter Richmond

Already, companies that speak in the language of the pitch, the dog-and-pony show, are no longer speaking to anyone. - Unknown

A simple rule of business is, if you do the things that are easier first, then you can actually make a lot of progress. - Mark Zuckerberg

It has been said that figures rule the world. Maybe. But I am sure that figures tell us whether it is being ruled well or badly. - Johann Wolfgang von Goethe

The wise man is but a clever infant, spelling letters from a hieroglyphical prophetic book, the lexicon of which lies in eternity. - Thomas Carlyle

When I am abroad, I always make it a rule never to criticize or attack the government of my country. I make up for lost time when I am at home. - Winston Churchill


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10-Jul-2020