The Doctor ordered his patient to have not more than one drink a day.
The next week the patient reported that he was following orders and was up to March, 2018.
Wine is bottled poetry. - Robert Louis Stevenson
Beer speaks. People mumble. - Tony McGee
In wine, there is the truth. - Pliny the Elder
I work until beer o'clock. - Stephen King
I like a wine that fights back. - John Steed
Gin was mother's milk to her. - George Bernard Shaw
Wine is my favorite 4 letter word. - Unknown
Does wine count as a serving of fruit? - Joe-kster
You can never buy beer, you just rent it. - Archie Bunker
Life is too short to drink the house wine. - Helen Thomas
Beer. Now there's a temporary solution. - Homer Simpson
Wine improves with age. I improve with wine. - Unknown
I'm Hybrid. I run on chocolate and wine. - Unknown
Milk without fat is like nonalcoholic Scotch. - Andy Rooney
Step aside Coffee. This is a job for Alcohol. - Unknown
One tequila, two tequila, three tequila, floor. - George Carlin
Talking to you is like casting pearls into wine. - Archie Bunker
There was a sound in their voices which suggested rum. - Robert Louis Sevenson
It was 2:00 p.m., too early for wine but not for chocolate. - Andrea Hurst
I'm on a whiskey diet. I've lost three days already. - Tommy Cooper
Herb is the healing of a nation, alcohol is the destruction. - Bob Marley
I'm only a beer teetotaller, not a champagne teetotaller. - George Bernard Shaw
One martini is all right, two is too many, three is not enough. - James Thurber
God invented whiskey to prevent the Irish from ruling the world. - Irish Saying
Memorial services are the cocktail parties of the geriatric set. - Ralph Richardson
I'm aging like fine wine. I'm getting complex and fruity. - Unknown
You ought to get out of those wet clothes and into a dry martini. - Mae West
Ah, good ol' trustworthy beer. My love for you will never die. - Homer Simpson
Give me a woman who truly loves beer and I will conquer the world. - Kaiser Willhelm II
We are all mortal until the first kiss and the second glass of wine. - Eduardo Galeano
In heaven there is no beer...
That's why we drink ours here. - Unknown
Men are like wine. Some turn to vinegar, but the best improve with age. - Pope John XXIII
A bottle of wine contains more philosophy than all the books in the world. - Louis Pasteur
In 1969 I gave up women and alcohol - it was the worst 20 minutes of my life. - George Best
Whiskey is by far the most popular of all remedies that won't cure a cold. - Jerry Vale
I exercise extreme self control. I never drink anything stronger than gin before breakfast. - WC Fields
I don't drink these days. I am allergic to alcohol and narcotics. I break out in handcuffs. - Robert Downey Jr.
An Irishman after trying American beer for the first time: "Put it back in the horse!" - Unknown
He's so full of alcohol, if you put a lighted wick in his mouth he'd burn for three days. - Groucho Marx
Great people talk about ideas, average people talk about things, and small people talk about wine. - Fran Lebowitz
Every form of addiction is bad, no matter whether the narcotic be alcohol or morphine or idealism. - Carl Jung
I'm making wine at home, but I'm making it out of raisins so it will be aged automatically. - Steven Wright
I'd learned some things. I knew you weren't supposed to hold a good wine at the top - the paper bag falls off. - Pat Paulsen
It was so quiet, a reservation kind of quiet, where you can hear somebody drinking whiskey on the rocks three miles away. - Sherman Alexie
I have made an important discovery - that alcohol, taken in sufficient quantities, produces all the effects of intoxication. - Oscar Wilde
A woman should never be seen eating or drinking, unless it be lobster salad and Champagne, the only true feminine and becoming viands. - George G. Byron
Irish whiskey was first developed for its medicinal benefits. It's just lucky for the rest of us that the Irish are such a sickly bunch. - Unknown
Alcohol is not in my vodkabulary. However, I looked it up on whiskeypedia and learned if you drink too much of it, it's likely tequilya. - Unknown
NASA's robot Curiosity landed on Mars. Early pictures show no signs of ESPN or beer. This makes it very clear that men are not from Mars. - Unknown
If you sang "99 Bottles of Beer on the Wall" and counted all the numbers mentioned throughout the entire song, it would add up to 14,850. - Joe-kster
Beer speaks. People mumble. - Tony McGee
In wine, there is the truth. - Pliny the Elder
I work until beer o'clock. - Stephen King
I like a wine that fights back. - John Steed
Gin was mother's milk to her. - George Bernard Shaw
Wine is my favorite 4 letter word. - Unknown
Does wine count as a serving of fruit? - Joe-kster
You can never buy beer, you just rent it. - Archie Bunker
Life is too short to drink the house wine. - Helen Thomas
Beer. Now there's a temporary solution. - Homer Simpson
Wine improves with age. I improve with wine. - Unknown
I'm Hybrid. I run on chocolate and wine. - Unknown
Milk without fat is like nonalcoholic Scotch. - Andy Rooney
Step aside Coffee. This is a job for Alcohol. - Unknown
One tequila, two tequila, three tequila, floor. - George Carlin
Talking to you is like casting pearls into wine. - Archie Bunker
There was a sound in their voices which suggested rum. - Robert Louis Sevenson
It was 2:00 p.m., too early for wine but not for chocolate. - Andrea Hurst
I'm on a whiskey diet. I've lost three days already. - Tommy Cooper
Herb is the healing of a nation, alcohol is the destruction. - Bob Marley
I'm only a beer teetotaller, not a champagne teetotaller. - George Bernard Shaw
One martini is all right, two is too many, three is not enough. - James Thurber
God invented whiskey to prevent the Irish from ruling the world. - Irish Saying
Memorial services are the cocktail parties of the geriatric set. - Ralph Richardson
I'm aging like fine wine. I'm getting complex and fruity. - Unknown
You ought to get out of those wet clothes and into a dry martini. - Mae West
Ah, good ol' trustworthy beer. My love for you will never die. - Homer Simpson
Give me a woman who truly loves beer and I will conquer the world. - Kaiser Willhelm II
We are all mortal until the first kiss and the second glass of wine. - Eduardo Galeano
In heaven there is no beer...
That's why we drink ours here. - Unknown
Men are like wine. Some turn to vinegar, but the best improve with age. - Pope John XXIII
A bottle of wine contains more philosophy than all the books in the world. - Louis Pasteur
In 1969 I gave up women and alcohol - it was the worst 20 minutes of my life. - George Best
Whiskey is by far the most popular of all remedies that won't cure a cold. - Jerry Vale
I exercise extreme self control. I never drink anything stronger than gin before breakfast. - WC Fields
I don't drink these days. I am allergic to alcohol and narcotics. I break out in handcuffs. - Robert Downey Jr.
An Irishman after trying American beer for the first time: "Put it back in the horse!" - Unknown
He's so full of alcohol, if you put a lighted wick in his mouth he'd burn for three days. - Groucho Marx
Great people talk about ideas, average people talk about things, and small people talk about wine. - Fran Lebowitz
Every form of addiction is bad, no matter whether the narcotic be alcohol or morphine or idealism. - Carl Jung
I'm making wine at home, but I'm making it out of raisins so it will be aged automatically. - Steven Wright
I'd learned some things. I knew you weren't supposed to hold a good wine at the top - the paper bag falls off. - Pat Paulsen
It was so quiet, a reservation kind of quiet, where you can hear somebody drinking whiskey on the rocks three miles away. - Sherman Alexie
I have made an important discovery - that alcohol, taken in sufficient quantities, produces all the effects of intoxication. - Oscar Wilde
A woman should never be seen eating or drinking, unless it be lobster salad and Champagne, the only true feminine and becoming viands. - George G. Byron
Irish whiskey was first developed for its medicinal benefits. It's just lucky for the rest of us that the Irish are such a sickly bunch. - Unknown
Alcohol is not in my vodkabulary. However, I looked it up on whiskeypedia and learned if you drink too much of it, it's likely tequilya. - Unknown
NASA's robot Curiosity landed on Mars. Early pictures show no signs of ESPN or beer. This makes it very clear that men are not from Mars. - Unknown
If you sang "99 Bottles of Beer on the Wall" and counted all the numbers mentioned throughout the entire song, it would add up to 14,850. - Joe-kster
see also Beer & Doctor Sections
A Woman’s Mind
Bartender Spill
Costco Wine
Cup That Runneth Over
Female Attraction
Flower Shop For Men
iGifts
Long, Happy Marriage
Looking For Your Wife?
One Glass Per Day
One Slice
Real Man’s Point System
Red Wine Diet
Redneck Wine Glass
Romance Lost
Secret of a Good Marriage
Secret Of A Long Marriage
Understanding Women
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09-Apr-2020 |