Chicken Literacy

Beware of chickens in public libraries


A pair of chickens walk into a public library, find the librarian and say, “Buk Buk BUK.”
The librarian decides that the chickens want three books, and promptly gives them some. Without further ado, the chickens walk out.

Around midday, the two chickens are back and looking quite annoyed. One leans over to the librarian and says, “Buk Buk BuKKOOK!”
The librarian decides that the chickens want another three books and promptly gives them some more. The chickens leave as before.

About an hour later the two birds march back in, approach the librarian, looking very angry now and nearly shouting, “Buk Buk Buk Buk Bukkooook!”

The librarian is now starting to get worried about where all her stock is going. She decides to give them more books but also to follow them and find out what’s happening.

She followed them out of the library, out of town, and into to a park. At this point, she hid behind a tree, not wanting to be seen.

She saw the two chickens throwing the books at a frog in a pond, to which the frog kept repeating, “Rrredit Rrredit Rrredit...”


QuotaBills
Theories pass. The frog remains. - Jean Rostand

I'm a tadpole trying to be a frog. - Toni Braxton

I'm too drunk to taste this chicken. - Colonel Sanders

Dance is the hidden language of the soul. - Martha Graham

The only thing chicken about Israel is their soup. - Bob Hope

Life is a foreign language; all men mispronounce it. - Christopher Morley

At night, here in the library, the ghosts have voices. - Alberto Manguel

Language exerts hidden power, like a moon on the tides. - Rita Mae Brown

Drawing on my fine command of language, I said nothing. - Robert Benchley

The art of communication is the language of leadership. - James Humes

Man invented language to satisfy his deep need to complain. - Lily Tomlin

I have always imagined that Paradise will be a kind of library. - Jorge Luis Borges

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because you didn't cook it! - Gordon Ramsay

Think like a wise man but communicate in the language of the people. - William Butler Yeats

England and America are two countries separated by a common language. - George Bernard Shaw

If you want chicken soup, you've got to put a chicken in the pot. - Joe Segal

If truth is beauty, how come no one has their hair done in the library? - Lily Tomlin

Kindness is the language which the deaf can hear and the blind can see. - Mark Twain

Dreams say what they mean, but they don't say it in daytime language. - Gail Godwin

Symptoms are the body's mother tongue; signs are in a foreign language. - John Brown

No one has a finer command of language than the person who keeps his mouth shut. - Sam Rayburn

Three problems we have: lack of boundaries, insufficient language, incompletions. - Thomas Leonard

The most beautiful words in the English language are "cheque enclosed". - Dorothy Parker

The language of the law must not be foreign to the ears of those who are to obey it. - Learned hand

We really have everything in common with America nowadays except, of course, language. - Oscar Wilde

Trouble is, by the time you can read a girl like a book, your library card has expired. - Milton Berle

Do I have a large frog in my hair? I'm worried about the sensation of my brain being eaten. - Joaquin Phoenix

Human language appears to be a unique phenomenon, without significant analogue in the animal world. - Noam Chomsky

Love, like a chicken salad or restaurant hash, must be taken with blind faith or it loses its flavor. - Helen Rowland

I'd kiss a frog even if there was no promise of a Prince Charming popping out of it. I love frogs. - Cameron Diaz

I was diagnosed with diabetes at age 18. I didn't know what it was, so I went to the library and looked it up. - Ron Santo

Language, identity, place, home: these are all of a piece - just different elements of belonging and not-belonging. - Jhumpa Lahiri

The longest word in the English language is the one following the phrase, "And now a word from our sponsor." - Hal Eaton

Morals are an acquirement - like music, like a foreign language, like piety, poker, paralysis - no man is born with them. - Mark Twain

Life is like a library owned by the author. In it are a few books which he wrote himself, but most of them were written for him. - Harry Emerson Fosdick

The nine most terrifying words in the English language are,
"I'm from the government and I'm here to help." - Ronald Reagan

What's the two things they tell you are healthiest to eat? Chicken and fish. You know what you should do? Combine them, eat a penguin. - Dave Attell

Music is a language that doesn't speak in particular words. It speaks in emotions, and if it's in the bones, it's in the bones. - Keith Richards

Humor can be dissected, as a frog can, but the thing dies in the process and the innards are discouraging to any but the pure scientific mind. - E.B. White

I remain convinced that obstinate addiction to ordinary language in our private thoughts is one of the main obstacles to progress in philosophy. - Bertrand Russell


see also   Animal,  Language  &  Pun  Sections
Big Bird Feeder
Chicken Farm Wedding
Chicken Photobomb
Chicken Pie
Chicken Rider
Chicken Shoes
Chicken Wire Art
Comfortable Chicken
Fast Beach Chicken
Free Chicken Strips
High Wire Bear Feeder
How To Serve Chicken Wings To A Man
Hummingbird Feeder
Life Cycle of a Chicken
Polish Chicken Farm
Redneck Bird Feeder
Redneck Chicken Farmer
Things That Taste Like Chicken

 

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05-Aug-2020