Zombie Survival Guide

Guide to complete protection from the living dead

How a cat survives post-Halloween stress



Zombie Survival Guide

QuotaBills
So many horrid Ghosts. - William Shakespeare

Zombies hate fast food. - Unknown

All cats appear grey in the dark. - English Proverb

Meow means "woof" in cat. - George Carlin

When the cat dies, the mice rejoice. - African saying

Zombies eat brains. You're safe. - Unknown

I've made a career off of Halloween. - Cassandra Peterson

Survival is a major contributor to longevity. - Unknown

My only career goal is to be a Halloween icon. - Nuno Roque

Humor is one of the best ingredients of survival. - Aung San Suu Kyi

It's easier to dismiss ghosts in the daylight. - Patricia Briggs

Dogs can't operate an MRI machine but cats can. - Unknown

The muses are ghosts, and sometimes they come uninvited. - Stephen King

Halloween starts earlier and earlier, just like Christmas. - Robert Englund

Everyone makes fun of the Redneck until the Zombie Apocalypse. - Unknown

Hairball: When a cat throws up to the basketball hoop, and misses - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

We'd show an Alzheimer's survivor here, if there were one. - Unknown

It is not clear that intelligence has any long-term survival value. - Stephen Hawking

The main difference between a cat and a lie is that a cat only has nine lives. - Mark Twain

I was such an ugly kid. When I played in the sandbox, the cat kept covering me up. - Rodney Dangerfield

Lettin' the cat outta the bag is a whole lot easier'n puttin' it back. - Will Rogers

The ghosts of things that never happened are worse than the ghosts of things that did. - L.M. Montgomery

The cat could very well be man's best friend but would never stoop to admitting it. - Doug Larson

Monsters are real, and ghosts are real, too. They live inside us, and sometimes they win. - Stephen King

Maybe all the people who say ghosts don't exist are just afraid to admit that they do. - Michael Ende

I have studied many philosophers and many cats. The wisdom of cats is infinitely superior. - Hippolyte Taine

Message boards are like going to a Halloween masquerade party. Everybody has a screen name. - John Mackey

We are driven by five genetic needs: survival, love and belonging, power, freedom, and fun. - William Glasser

One of the most striking differences between a cat and a lie is that a cat has only nine lives. - Mark Twain

The zombies were like Canadians, in that they looked enough like real people at first, to fool you. - Kelly Link

Seems like Americans just want it to be Halloween all year. The holiday just keeps getting more popular. - Amity Shlaes

I see my face in the mirror and go, 'I'm a Halloween costume? That's what they think of me?' - Drew Carey

If human beings had genuine courage, they'd wear their costumes every day of the year, not just on Halloween. - Douglas Coupland

I will be deafer than the blue-eyed cat, And thrice as blind as any noonday owl, To holy virgins in their ecstasies. - Alfred Tennyson

A tom cat hijacked a plane, stuck a pistol into the pilot's ribs and demanded, "Take me to the Canaries." - Bob Monkhouse

An actor is never so great as when he reminds you of an animal - falling like a cat, lying like a dog, moving like a fox. - Francois Truffaut

Halloween is one of my favorite days of the year. I have a strict rule: I don't work on Halloween and I won't travel on Halloween. - Simon Sinek

If animals could speak, the dog would be a blundering outspoken fellow; but the cat would have the rare grace of never saying a word too much. - Mark Twain

All my life, I have been a celebrant of Halloween. For me, it is the most important day of the year, the turning point in the old pagan calendar. - John Burnside

When I hear of an 'equity' in a case like this, I am reminded of a blind man in a dark room - looking for a black cat - which isn't there. - Charles Bowen


see also   Cat  &  Survivor  Sections
Boat Safety
Zombie Response Team

 

Pittsburghese

Whose Problem

Grasping Shirt

An Evening Prayer

Baby Clone

Piano Ring

Religious Nuts

Funnel Farm

Urinal Challenge

Snow Detour

Redneck GPS

Snow Receiver

Book Perspective

Why Stand In Line?

How Twins Are Made

Ups and Downs

Irish Flu Shots

Snake Circle

Romantic Accident

Winter Mirror
Full list of creditsFacebookTwitterDiggStumbleUponDelicious

24-Jan-2021