The Pope Visits Donald Trump

Walking on water demonstrates pontiff point


Donald Trump invited the Pope for lunch on his mega yacht. The Pope accepted, and during lunch, a puff of wind blew the Pontiff’s hat off, right into the water. It floated off about 50 feet, then the wind died down and it just floated away.

The crew and the security team were scrambling to launch a boat to go get it, when Trump waved them off, saying “Never mind, boys, I will get it.”

The Donald climbed over the side of the yacht, walked on the water to the hat, picked it up, walked back on the water, climbed onto the yacht, and handed the Pope his hat.

The crew was speechless. The security team and the Pope’s entourage were speechless.

No one knew what to say, not even the Pope.

But that afternoon, NBC knew how to cover the story. Their banner headline read, “Trump Can’t Swim.”


QuotaBills
All politics is local. - Thomas P O'Neil

Religion altars the mind. - Tony Follari

All politics is applesauce. - Will Rogers

Politics is an inexact science. - Otto von Bismarck

Politics is war by other measures. - Steve Bannon

Man is by nature a political animal. - Aristotle

Every religion at its core is exclusive. - Ravi Zacharias

I love shark week, all kids swim for free. - Josh Stern

In politics an absurdity is not a handicap. - Napoleon Bonaparte

Every country has the government it deserves. - Joseph de Maistre

From politics, it was an easy step to silence. - Jane Austen

Self-government won't work without self-discipline. - Paul Harvey

Politics is too serious a matter to be left to the politicians. - Charles de Gaulle

War has rules, mud wrestling has rules - politics has no rules. - Ross Perot

No man drowns if he perseveres in praying to God, and can swim. - Russian Proverb

It's a terrible shame that politics has become show business. - Sydney Pollack

Leadership, like swimming, cannot be learned by reading about it. - Henry Mintzberg

Don't they get afraid, then?
They have a religion for that. - Ray Bradbury

I wish the government would put a tax on pianos for the incompetent. - Edith Sitwell

The duty of a patriot is to protect his country from its government. - Edward Abbey

In politics, madame, you need two things: friends, but above all an enemy. - Brian Mulroney

The flood of money that gushes into politics today is a pollution of democracy. - Theodore White

A filmmaker we almost lost to politics... my friend and colleague, Warren Beatty. - Jack Nicholson

Personally, I'm against political jokes. Too often they get elected to office. - Henny Youngman

A government which robs Peter to pay Paul can always depend on the support of Paul. - George Bernard Shaw

There are two ways of disliking poetry; one way is to dislike it, the other is to read Pope. - Oscar Wilde

Reporter: "How many people work at the Vatican?"
Pope John XXIII: "About half." - Pope John XXIII

Like a great Eastern religion says, it's all about striking a balance between the ping and the pong. - Kelly

A diplomat is someone who can tell you to go to hell in such a way that you will look forward to the trip. - Caskie Stinnett

Why does not the Pope build St. Peter's with his own money, rather than with the money of poor believers? - Martin Luther

The business of government is to keep the government out of business - that is, unless business needs government aid. - Will Rogers

It's especially hard if the government is not providing services, or is even conducting ethnic cleansing against you. - Paul Harvey

It was revealed in a government survey published today that the Prime Minister is doing the work of two men, Laurel and Hardy. - Ronnie Corbett

It's better to swim in the sea below
Than to swing in the air and feed the crow,
Says jolly Ned Teach of Bristol. - Benjamin Franklin

If NASA has a 14 minute delay for an event 155,000,000 miles away, hoe come NBC has a 6 hour delay for an event 3,500 miles away? - Unknown

I find that the nicest and best people generally profess no religion at all, but are ready to like the best men of all religions. - Samuel Butler

When I am abroad, I always make it a rule never to criticize or attack the government of my country. I make up for lost time when I am at home. - Winston Churchill

In politics, as in womanizing, failure is decisive. It sheds its retrospective gloom on earlier endeavor which at the time seemed full of promise. - Malcolm Muggeridge

If one morning I walked on top of the water across the Potomac River, the headline that afternoon would read: "President Can't Swim." - Lyndon B. Johnson

Jokes of the proper kind, properly told, can do more to enlighten questions of politics, philosophy, and literature than any number of dull arguments. - Isaac Asimov


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06-Jul-2022