A little girl asked her Mom, “Mom, may I take the dog for a walk around the block?”
Mom replies, “No, because she is in heat.”
“What’s that mean?” asked the child.
“Go ask your father. I think he’s in the garage.”
The little girl goes to the garage and says, “Dad, may I take Belle for a walk around the block? I asked Mom, but she said the dog was in heat, and to come to you.”
Dad said, “Bring Belle over here.” He took a rag, soaked it with gasoline, and scrubbed the dog’s backside with it and said, “Okay, you can go now, but keep Belle on the leash and only go one time around the block.”
The little girl left, and returned a few minutes later with no dog on the leash.
Surprised, Dad asked, “Where’s Belle?”
The little girl said, “She ran out of gas about halfway down the block, so another dog is pushing her home.”
Love me, love my dog. - English Proverb
France is a dog-hole. - William Shakespeare
Every dog has his day. - Unknown
Let sleeping dogs lie. - French Proverb
Let fightin' dogs lie - Archie Bunker
Sleeping dogs bark the loudest. - Archie Bunker
Never let the tail wag the dog. - Unknown
Dogs never bite me. Just humans. - Marilyn Monroe
Southpaw: A dog who is left-handed - Daffynitions joe-ks.com
How much is that doggie in the window? - Bob Merrill
I am I because my little dog knows me. - Gertrude Stein
The view only changes for the lead dog. - Norman O. Brown
My little dog - a heartbeat at my feet. - Edith Wharton
Dogs that bark at a distance never bite. - Unknown
A dog in desperation will leap over a wall. - Unknown
I'm walking here! I'm walking here! - Midnight Cowboy
The dog represents all that is best in man. - Etienne Charlet
He who lies down with dogs, rises with fleas. - English Proverb
Content is fire and social media is gasoline. - Jay Baer
Our dog died from licking our wedding picture. - Phyllis Diller
Don't think to hunt two hares with one dog. - Benjamin Franklin
Wok The Dog: Specialty at Vietnamese Restaurants - Daffynitions joe-ks.com
I love a dog. He does nothing for political reasons. - Will Rogers
Properly trained, a man can be dog's best friend. - Corey Ford
If a man be great, even his dog will ear a proud look. - Japanese Proverb
Dogs do speak, but only to those who know how to listen. - Unknown
A door is what a dog is perpetually on the wrong side of. - Ogden Nash
Gigantic: The biggest, scariest bug in your dog's fur - Daffynitions joe-ks.com
Everywhere is within walking distance if you have the time. - Steven Wright
Dogs are not our whole life, but they make our lives whole. - Roger Caras
I'm walking backwards for Christmas Across the Irish Sea. - Spike Milligan
wanderer, there is no path,
the path is made by walking. - Antonio Machado
If dogs could talk, it would take a lot of fun out of owning one. - Andrew A. Rooney
Dogs are getting bigger, according to a leading dog manufacturer. - Leo Rosten
Only a biker knows why a dog sticks his head out of a car window. - Unknown
No man should live where he can hear his neighbor's dog bark. - Nathaniel Macon
If you're already walking on thin ice, you might as well dance. - Proverb
A dog is a man's best friend. A cat is a cat's best friend. - Robert J Vogel
I have nothing against dogs. I just hate rugs that go squish-squish. - Phyllis Diller
Hiking's not for everyone. Notice the wilderness is mostly empty. - Sonja Yoerg
I had rather hear my dog bark at a crow, than a man swear he loves me. - William Shakespeare
Anybody who doesn't know what soap tastes like never washed a dog. - Franklin P Jones
It was a great interview process. They were fighting like cats and dogs. - Donald Trump
I wonder if other dogs think poodles are members of a weird religious cult. - Rita Rudner
I feel like a midget with muddy feet had been walking over my tongue all night. - WC Fields
From every Englishman emanates a kind of gas, the deadly choke-lamp of boredom. - Heinrich Heine
Keep your bike in good repair: motorcycle boots are not comfortable for walking. - Unknown
Birds with broken wings walking on the ground were once flying high up in the sky. - Mehmet M Ildan
Raising boys is like raising puppies. One must take them for a walk every few hours. - Jody Defries
Life is like a dogsled team. If you ain't the lead dog, the scenery never changes. - Lewis Grizzard
Don't accept your dog's admiration as conclusive evidence that you are wonderful. - Ann Landers
I have to tell them that last night was a shameful train wreck filled with blind cuddly puppies. - Charlie Sheen
Don't make the mistake of treating your dogs like humans, or they'll treat you like dogs. - Martha Scott
You might be a redneck if your favorite hunting dog has a bigger tombstone than your grandfather. - Jeff Foxworthy
Outside of a dog, a book is a man's best friend.
Inside of a dog it's too dark to read. - Groucho Marx
You don't go walking into the proverbial lion's den lightly. You start with a good breakfast. - Jim Butcher
If you don't want your dog to have bad breath, do what I do: pour a little Lavoris in the toilet. - Jay Leno
Obama and his attack dogs have nothing but hate and anger in their hearts and spew it whenever possible. - Donald Trump
For us in Russia, communism is a dead dog, while, for many people in the West, it is still a living lion. - Aleksandr Solzhenitsyn
America is a large, friendly dog in a very small room. Every time it wags its tail, it knocks over a chair. - Arnold Toynbee
When your children are teenagers, it's important to have a dog so that someone in the house is happy to see you. - Nora Ephron
I still play hockey every now and then, and I still golf. But my biggest exercise is walking my big dog in the park every day. - Michael J. Fox
If a dog jumps in your lap, it is because he is fond of you; but if a cat does the same thing, it is because your lap is warmer. - Alfred N Whitehead
Making the decision to have a child is momentous. It is to decide forever to have your heart go walking around outside your body. - Elizabeth Stone
My husband and I are either going to buy a dog or have a child. We can't decide whether to ruin our carpet or ruin our lives. - Rita Rudner
If you pick up a starving dog and make him prosperous, he will not bite you. This is the principal difference between a dog and a man. - Mark Twain
I put contact lenses in my dog's eyes. They had little pictures of cats on them. Then I took one out and he ran around in circles. - Steven Wright
The trout enjoys the river,
The whale enjoys the sea,
And dogs love most an old lamp-post,
But you're my cup of tea. - W H Auden
Money is like gasoline during a road trip. You don't want to run out of gas on your trip, but you're not doing a tour of gas stations. - Tim O'Reilly
My life is the land, the dogs, the car, the motorcycle, the pond, the canoe, going to pick up mail. It's just a rural retreat that I enjoy. - Burt Shavitz
France is a dog-hole. - William Shakespeare
Every dog has his day. - Unknown
Let sleeping dogs lie. - French Proverb
Let fightin' dogs lie - Archie Bunker
Sleeping dogs bark the loudest. - Archie Bunker
Never let the tail wag the dog. - Unknown
Dogs never bite me. Just humans. - Marilyn Monroe
Southpaw: A dog who is left-handed - Daffynitions joe-ks.com
How much is that doggie in the window? - Bob Merrill
I am I because my little dog knows me. - Gertrude Stein
The view only changes for the lead dog. - Norman O. Brown
My little dog - a heartbeat at my feet. - Edith Wharton
Dogs that bark at a distance never bite. - Unknown
A dog in desperation will leap over a wall. - Unknown
I'm walking here! I'm walking here! - Midnight Cowboy
The dog represents all that is best in man. - Etienne Charlet
He who lies down with dogs, rises with fleas. - English Proverb
Content is fire and social media is gasoline. - Jay Baer
Our dog died from licking our wedding picture. - Phyllis Diller
Don't think to hunt two hares with one dog. - Benjamin Franklin
Wok The Dog: Specialty at Vietnamese Restaurants - Daffynitions joe-ks.com
I love a dog. He does nothing for political reasons. - Will Rogers
Properly trained, a man can be dog's best friend. - Corey Ford
If a man be great, even his dog will ear a proud look. - Japanese Proverb
Dogs do speak, but only to those who know how to listen. - Unknown
A door is what a dog is perpetually on the wrong side of. - Ogden Nash
Gigantic: The biggest, scariest bug in your dog's fur - Daffynitions joe-ks.com
Everywhere is within walking distance if you have the time. - Steven Wright
Dogs are not our whole life, but they make our lives whole. - Roger Caras
I'm walking backwards for Christmas Across the Irish Sea. - Spike Milligan
wanderer, there is no path,
the path is made by walking. - Antonio Machado
If dogs could talk, it would take a lot of fun out of owning one. - Andrew A. Rooney
Dogs are getting bigger, according to a leading dog manufacturer. - Leo Rosten
Only a biker knows why a dog sticks his head out of a car window. - Unknown
No man should live where he can hear his neighbor's dog bark. - Nathaniel Macon
If you're already walking on thin ice, you might as well dance. - Proverb
A dog is a man's best friend. A cat is a cat's best friend. - Robert J Vogel
I have nothing against dogs. I just hate rugs that go squish-squish. - Phyllis Diller
Hiking's not for everyone. Notice the wilderness is mostly empty. - Sonja Yoerg
I had rather hear my dog bark at a crow, than a man swear he loves me. - William Shakespeare
Anybody who doesn't know what soap tastes like never washed a dog. - Franklin P Jones
It was a great interview process. They were fighting like cats and dogs. - Donald Trump
I wonder if other dogs think poodles are members of a weird religious cult. - Rita Rudner
I feel like a midget with muddy feet had been walking over my tongue all night. - WC Fields
From every Englishman emanates a kind of gas, the deadly choke-lamp of boredom. - Heinrich Heine
Keep your bike in good repair: motorcycle boots are not comfortable for walking. - Unknown
Birds with broken wings walking on the ground were once flying high up in the sky. - Mehmet M Ildan
Raising boys is like raising puppies. One must take them for a walk every few hours. - Jody Defries
Life is like a dogsled team. If you ain't the lead dog, the scenery never changes. - Lewis Grizzard
Don't accept your dog's admiration as conclusive evidence that you are wonderful. - Ann Landers
I have to tell them that last night was a shameful train wreck filled with blind cuddly puppies. - Charlie Sheen
Don't make the mistake of treating your dogs like humans, or they'll treat you like dogs. - Martha Scott
You might be a redneck if your favorite hunting dog has a bigger tombstone than your grandfather. - Jeff Foxworthy
Outside of a dog, a book is a man's best friend.
Inside of a dog it's too dark to read. - Groucho Marx
You don't go walking into the proverbial lion's den lightly. You start with a good breakfast. - Jim Butcher
If you don't want your dog to have bad breath, do what I do: pour a little Lavoris in the toilet. - Jay Leno
Obama and his attack dogs have nothing but hate and anger in their hearts and spew it whenever possible. - Donald Trump
For us in Russia, communism is a dead dog, while, for many people in the West, it is still a living lion. - Aleksandr Solzhenitsyn
America is a large, friendly dog in a very small room. Every time it wags its tail, it knocks over a chair. - Arnold Toynbee
When your children are teenagers, it's important to have a dog so that someone in the house is happy to see you. - Nora Ephron
I still play hockey every now and then, and I still golf. But my biggest exercise is walking my big dog in the park every day. - Michael J. Fox
If a dog jumps in your lap, it is because he is fond of you; but if a cat does the same thing, it is because your lap is warmer. - Alfred N Whitehead
Making the decision to have a child is momentous. It is to decide forever to have your heart go walking around outside your body. - Elizabeth Stone
My husband and I are either going to buy a dog or have a child. We can't decide whether to ruin our carpet or ruin our lives. - Rita Rudner
If you pick up a starving dog and make him prosperous, he will not bite you. This is the principal difference between a dog and a man. - Mark Twain
I put contact lenses in my dog's eyes. They had little pictures of cats on them. Then I took one out and he ran around in circles. - Steven Wright
The trout enjoys the river,
The whale enjoys the sea,
And dogs love most an old lamp-post,
But you're my cup of tea. - W H Auden
Money is like gasoline during a road trip. You don't want to run out of gas on your trip, but you're not doing a tour of gas stations. - Tim O'Reilly
My life is the land, the dogs, the car, the motorcycle, the pond, the canoe, going to pick up mail. It's just a rural retreat that I enjoy. - Burt Shavitz
see also Dog Section
Babysitter Dog
 Famous Equations |  Ain't Mowing the Lawn Anymore |  Crocpox |  Deer Me! |  Inverted Helicopter |
 Water Hat |  NASCAR Fan - Diehard Category |  Busted |  Build It - They Will Come |  Exhausted Baby |
 Monkeypox II |  Overloaded Bookshop |  Grass Leak |  Family Tent |  False Dreams |
 Fishnet Stockings |  Saskatchewan Freeway |  They All Look So Jacozy |  Sunset Eclipse |  Ikea Blueprint |
28-May-2022 |