A husband walks into Fredrick’s of Hollywood to purchase some sheer lingerie for
his wife.
He is shown several possibilities that range from $250 to $500 in price - the
more sheer, the higher the price. He opts for the most sheer item, pays the $500
and takes the lingerie home.
He presents it to his wife and asks her to go upstairs, put it on and model it
for him.
Upstairs, the wife thinks, “I have an idea. It’s so sheer that I might as well
be nothing. I won’t put it on, do the modeling naked, return it tomorrow and
keep the $500 refund for myself.”
So she appears naked on the balcony and strikes a pose.
The husband says, “Good Lord! You’d think that for $500, they’d at least iron it!”
He never heard the shot.
Funeral services are pending...
Brevity is the soul of lingerie. - Dorothy Parker
The great gift of Easter is hope. - Basil C Hume
Knewlyweds: Second marriage for both - Daffynitions joe-ks.com
Grace: nutrient in the marriage garden - Phil Callaway
Marriage is the chief cause of divorce. - Groucho Marx
Conceit is God's gift to little men. - Bruce Barton
Treasure your relationships, not your possessions. - Anthony J. D'Angelo
Sticking with a marriage. That's true grit, man. - Jeff Bridges
Never trust a husband too far, nor a bachelor too near. - Helen Rowland
There is no perfect marriage, for there are no perfect men. - French Proverb
Hand Scanner: Singles bar prowler looking for wedding rings - Daffynitions joe-ks.com
For business, our Internet love affair was a gift from the gods. - Gary Vaynerchuk
I've been married twice but I haven't had a marriage yet. - Jennifer Lopez
Real magic in relationships means an absence of judgment of others. - Wayne Dyer
Honesty is a very expensive gift. Don't expect it from cheap people. - Warren Buffett
Marriage halves our griefs, doubles our joys, and quadruples our expenses. - G K Chesterton
College is a place to keep warm between high school and an early marriage. - George Gobel
The excellence of a gift lies in its appropriateness rather than in its value. - Charles Dudley Warner
Today we celebrate the gift of victory over every fall we have ever experienced. - Jeffrey R Holland
The meaning of life is to find your gift. The purpose of life is to give it away. - Pablo Picasso
Peppering your relationship with a dash of mystery can make it far more palatable. - Khang K. Nguyen
The story of Easter is the story of God's wonderful window of divine surprise. - Carl Knudsen
Marriage is like a bank account. You put it in, you take it out, you lose interest. - Irwin Corey
Only choose in marriage a woman whom you would choose as a friend if she were a man. - Joseph Joubert
A girl who thinks that a man will treat her better after marriage than before is a fool. - William C. Hall
We learn the most from imperfect relationships - things like forgiveness and compassion. - Andrea Thompson
Our marriage vows: till death do us part, for better for worse, in secrets and in health. - Archie Bunker
We seldom give each other advice - I think that's the success of 25 years of marriage. - Laura Bush
It's great to be a blonde. With low expectations it's very easy to surprise people. - Pamela Anderson
I believe in the institution of marriage, and I intend to keep trying until I get it right. - Richard Pryor
Somehow a bachelor never quite gets over the idea that he is a thing of beauty and a boy forever. - Helen Rowland
The key to a long and healthy marriage is that, honestly, there's nothing worth fighting about. - Jay Leno
Marriage is when a man and woman become as one; the trouble starts when they try to decide which one. - Unknown
Marriage is the only known example of the happy meeting of the immovable object and the irresistible force. - Ogden Nash
Forgiveness does not exonerate the perpetrator. Forgiveness liberates the victim. It's a gift you give yourself. - T D Jakes
Men in general judge more from appearances than from reality. All men have eyes, but few have the gift of penetration. - Niccolo Machiavelli
If the marriage needs help, the answer almost always is have more fun. Drop your list of grievances and go ride a roller coaster. - Garrison Keillor
It's a funny relationship that makeup artists have. I always feel kind of like a dentist. People look at me and think of pain. - Rick Baker
Nothing is a surprise to God; nothing is a setback to His plans; nothing can thwart His purposes; and nothing is beyond His control. - Joni Eareckson Tada
To be happy, you must fancy that everything you have is a gift, and you the chosen, though you worked your tail off for every bit of it. - Robert Brault
The great gift of Easter is hope. - Basil C Hume
Knewlyweds: Second marriage for both - Daffynitions joe-ks.com
Grace: nutrient in the marriage garden - Phil Callaway
Marriage is the chief cause of divorce. - Groucho Marx
Conceit is God's gift to little men. - Bruce Barton
Treasure your relationships, not your possessions. - Anthony J. D'Angelo
Sticking with a marriage. That's true grit, man. - Jeff Bridges
Never trust a husband too far, nor a bachelor too near. - Helen Rowland
There is no perfect marriage, for there are no perfect men. - French Proverb
Hand Scanner: Singles bar prowler looking for wedding rings - Daffynitions joe-ks.com
For business, our Internet love affair was a gift from the gods. - Gary Vaynerchuk
I've been married twice but I haven't had a marriage yet. - Jennifer Lopez
Real magic in relationships means an absence of judgment of others. - Wayne Dyer
Honesty is a very expensive gift. Don't expect it from cheap people. - Warren Buffett
Marriage halves our griefs, doubles our joys, and quadruples our expenses. - G K Chesterton
College is a place to keep warm between high school and an early marriage. - George Gobel
The excellence of a gift lies in its appropriateness rather than in its value. - Charles Dudley Warner
Today we celebrate the gift of victory over every fall we have ever experienced. - Jeffrey R Holland
The meaning of life is to find your gift. The purpose of life is to give it away. - Pablo Picasso
Peppering your relationship with a dash of mystery can make it far more palatable. - Khang K. Nguyen
The story of Easter is the story of God's wonderful window of divine surprise. - Carl Knudsen
Marriage is like a bank account. You put it in, you take it out, you lose interest. - Irwin Corey
Only choose in marriage a woman whom you would choose as a friend if she were a man. - Joseph Joubert
A girl who thinks that a man will treat her better after marriage than before is a fool. - William C. Hall
We learn the most from imperfect relationships - things like forgiveness and compassion. - Andrea Thompson
Our marriage vows: till death do us part, for better for worse, in secrets and in health. - Archie Bunker
We seldom give each other advice - I think that's the success of 25 years of marriage. - Laura Bush
It's great to be a blonde. With low expectations it's very easy to surprise people. - Pamela Anderson
I believe in the institution of marriage, and I intend to keep trying until I get it right. - Richard Pryor
Somehow a bachelor never quite gets over the idea that he is a thing of beauty and a boy forever. - Helen Rowland
The key to a long and healthy marriage is that, honestly, there's nothing worth fighting about. - Jay Leno
Marriage is when a man and woman become as one; the trouble starts when they try to decide which one. - Unknown
Marriage is the only known example of the happy meeting of the immovable object and the irresistible force. - Ogden Nash
Forgiveness does not exonerate the perpetrator. Forgiveness liberates the victim. It's a gift you give yourself. - T D Jakes
Men in general judge more from appearances than from reality. All men have eyes, but few have the gift of penetration. - Niccolo Machiavelli
If the marriage needs help, the answer almost always is have more fun. Drop your list of grievances and go ride a roller coaster. - Garrison Keillor
It's a funny relationship that makeup artists have. I always feel kind of like a dentist. People look at me and think of pain. - Rick Baker
Nothing is a surprise to God; nothing is a setback to His plans; nothing can thwart His purposes; and nothing is beyond His control. - Joni Eareckson Tada
To be happy, you must fancy that everything you have is a gift, and you the chosen, though you worked your tail off for every bit of it. - Robert Brault
see also Marriage, Shopping & Stress Sections
A Woman’s Mind
Before Online Dating
Before The Impact
Everything Men Know About Women
Female Attraction
Flower Shop For Men
Hormone Guide
iGifts
Looking For Your Wife?
Mission Gap - for Men & Women
My Last Swim In The Ocean
Names of the Colours
Real Man’s Point System
Romance Lost
Secret Of A Long Marriage
The Last Photo I Took
Understanding Women
When Men Shop For Groceries
Winning An Argument With A Woman
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 Cat Couch Nap |  Redneck Trophy Fish |  Country Irony |  'None Of The Above' Election Option |  I've Got Your Back |
 Vintage Campers |  Great Minds of History |  But That Was Yesterday |  Trudeau's Top Fails |  Picture Of Me Getting Naked |
20-Sep-2021 |