A husband walks into Fredrick’s of Hollywood to purchase some sheer lingerie for
his wife.
He is shown several possibilities that range from $250 to $500 in price - the
more sheer, the higher the price. He opts for the most sheer item, pays the $500
and takes the lingerie home.
He presents it to his wife and asks her to go upstairs, put it on and model it
for him.
Upstairs, the wife thinks, “I have an idea. It’s so sheer that I might as well
be nothing. I won’t put it on, do the modeling naked, return it tomorrow and
keep the $500 refund for myself.”
So she appears naked on the balcony and strikes a pose.
The husband says, “Good Lord! You’d think that for $500, they’d at least iron it!”
He never heard the shot.
Funeral services are pending...
Marriage is heaven and hell. - German Proverb
Compromises are for relationships, not wine. - Robert S Caywood
Assumptions are the termites of relationships. - Henry Winkler
Love is blind, but marriage restores its sight. - Georg C. Lichtenberg
There is no more expensive thing than a free gift. - Michel de Montaigne
The backbone of surprise is fusing speed with secrecy. - Von Clausewitz
Never trust a husband too far, nor a bachelor too near. - Helen Rowland
The gods bestowed on him the gift of perpetual old age. - Oscar Wilde
Relationships are like a walk in the park. Jurassic Park. - Unknown
There's more to marriage than four bare legs in a bed. - English Proverb
There is no perfect marriage, for there are no perfect men. - French Proverb
For business, our Internet love affair was a gift from the gods. - Gary Vaynerchuk
A good marriage would be between a blind wife and a deaf husband. - Ogden Nash
A happy marriage is a long conversation which always seems too short. - Andre Maurois
Marriage is like mushrooms: we notice too late if they are good or bad. - Woody Allen
The greatest gift you can give another is the purity of your attention. - Richard Moss
Honesty is a very expensive gift. Don't expect it from cheap people. - Warren Buffett
The excellence of a gift lies in its appropriateness rather than in its value. - Charles Dudley Warner
The great majority of neuroses in women have their origin in the marriage bed. - Sigmund Freud
In marriage, being the right person is as important as finding the right person. - Wilbert Donald Gough
Today we celebrate the gift of victory over every fall we have ever experienced. - Jeffrey R Holland
Marriage is one of the few institutions that allow a man to do as his wife pleases. - Milton Berle
Your talent is God's gift to you. What you do with it is your gift back to God. - Leo Buscaglia
Marriage is wonderful institution... if, of course, you like living in an institution. - Groucho Marx
Love and respect are the most important aspects of parenting, and of all relationships. - Jodie Foster
Inspirations never go in for long engagements; they demand immediate marriage to action. - Unknown
You have a grand gift for silence, Watson. It makes you quite invaluable as a companion. - Arthur Conan Doyle
Let us now set forth one of the fundamental truths about marriage: the wife is in charge. - Bill Cosby
We seldom give each other advice - I think that's the success of 25 years of marriage. - Laura Bush
The one charm of marriage is that it makes a life of deception absolutely necessary for both parties. - Oscar Wilde
Romance is thinking about your significant other, when you are supposed to be thinking about something else. - Nicholas Sparks
Going without food or water will kill the body, but the lack of relationship will kill the minds and spirit. - David Jeremiah
There's a way of transferring funds that is even faster than electronic banking. It's called marriage. - Sam Kinison
Pigeons are gentle and smart and have complex social relationships. Their hearing and vision are both excellent. - Ingrid Newkirk
The circumstances of one's birth are irrelevant. It is what you do with the gift of life that determines who you are. - Mewtwo
The quality of your life is determined by the quality of your relationships. The quality of your business is no different. - Harvey Mackay
After marriage, husband and wife become two sides of a coin; they just can't face each other, but still they stay together. - Sacha Guitry
Don't over-analyze your marriage; it's like yanking up a fragile indoor plant every 20 minutes to see how its roots are growing. - Ogden Nash
Some people claim that marriage interferes with romance. There's no doubt about it. Anytime you have a romance, your wife is bound to interfere. - Groucho Marx
One advantage of marriage is that when you fall out of love with him or he falls out of love with you, it keeps you together until you fall in again. - Judith Viorst
Compromises are for relationships, not wine. - Robert S Caywood
Assumptions are the termites of relationships. - Henry Winkler
Love is blind, but marriage restores its sight. - Georg C. Lichtenberg
There is no more expensive thing than a free gift. - Michel de Montaigne
The backbone of surprise is fusing speed with secrecy. - Von Clausewitz
Never trust a husband too far, nor a bachelor too near. - Helen Rowland
The gods bestowed on him the gift of perpetual old age. - Oscar Wilde
Relationships are like a walk in the park. Jurassic Park. - Unknown
There's more to marriage than four bare legs in a bed. - English Proverb
There is no perfect marriage, for there are no perfect men. - French Proverb
For business, our Internet love affair was a gift from the gods. - Gary Vaynerchuk
A good marriage would be between a blind wife and a deaf husband. - Ogden Nash
A happy marriage is a long conversation which always seems too short. - Andre Maurois
Marriage is like mushrooms: we notice too late if they are good or bad. - Woody Allen
The greatest gift you can give another is the purity of your attention. - Richard Moss
Honesty is a very expensive gift. Don't expect it from cheap people. - Warren Buffett
The excellence of a gift lies in its appropriateness rather than in its value. - Charles Dudley Warner
The great majority of neuroses in women have their origin in the marriage bed. - Sigmund Freud
In marriage, being the right person is as important as finding the right person. - Wilbert Donald Gough
Today we celebrate the gift of victory over every fall we have ever experienced. - Jeffrey R Holland
Marriage is one of the few institutions that allow a man to do as his wife pleases. - Milton Berle
Your talent is God's gift to you. What you do with it is your gift back to God. - Leo Buscaglia
Marriage is wonderful institution... if, of course, you like living in an institution. - Groucho Marx
Love and respect are the most important aspects of parenting, and of all relationships. - Jodie Foster
Inspirations never go in for long engagements; they demand immediate marriage to action. - Unknown
You have a grand gift for silence, Watson. It makes you quite invaluable as a companion. - Arthur Conan Doyle
Let us now set forth one of the fundamental truths about marriage: the wife is in charge. - Bill Cosby
We seldom give each other advice - I think that's the success of 25 years of marriage. - Laura Bush
The one charm of marriage is that it makes a life of deception absolutely necessary for both parties. - Oscar Wilde
Romance is thinking about your significant other, when you are supposed to be thinking about something else. - Nicholas Sparks
Going without food or water will kill the body, but the lack of relationship will kill the minds and spirit. - David Jeremiah
There's a way of transferring funds that is even faster than electronic banking. It's called marriage. - Sam Kinison
Pigeons are gentle and smart and have complex social relationships. Their hearing and vision are both excellent. - Ingrid Newkirk
The circumstances of one's birth are irrelevant. It is what you do with the gift of life that determines who you are. - Mewtwo
The quality of your life is determined by the quality of your relationships. The quality of your business is no different. - Harvey Mackay
After marriage, husband and wife become two sides of a coin; they just can't face each other, but still they stay together. - Sacha Guitry
Don't over-analyze your marriage; it's like yanking up a fragile indoor plant every 20 minutes to see how its roots are growing. - Ogden Nash
Some people claim that marriage interferes with romance. There's no doubt about it. Anytime you have a romance, your wife is bound to interfere. - Groucho Marx
One advantage of marriage is that when you fall out of love with him or he falls out of love with you, it keeps you together until you fall in again. - Judith Viorst
see also Marriage, Shopping & Stress Sections
A Woman’s Mind
Before Online Dating
Before The Impact
Everything Men Know About Women
Female Attraction
Flower Shop For Men
Hormone Guide
iGifts
Looking For Your Wife?
Mission Gap - for Men & Women
My Last Swim In The Ocean
Names of the Colours
Real Man’s Point System
Romance Lost
Secret Of A Long Marriage
The Last Photo I Took
Understanding Women
When Men Shop For Groceries
Winning An Argument With A Woman
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01-Oct-2020 |