For Sale - One Useless Cat

A meowing cat catches no mice. - Yiddish proverb

International Spade The Cat Week - Archie Bunker

Don't judge a cat by its coat. - Magdalena VandenBerg

Dogs have masters. Cats have staff. - Unknown

Useless laws weaken necessary laws. - Charles de Secondat

When the cat's away, the mice will play. - French Proverb

A girl with cotton stockings never sees a mouse. - American Proverb

A mouse never entrusts his life to only one hole. - Plautus

Life without books, chocolate and coffee is just useless. - Nadun Lokuliyanage

The kind man feeds his cat before sitting down to dinner. - Hebrew Proverb

Mouse: An animal which strews its path with fainting women. - Ambrose Bierce

Women's clothes: never wear anything that panics the cat. - P.J. O'Rourke

The Cat. He walked by himself, and all places were alike to him. - Rudyard Kipling

If the cat sits long enough at the hole, it will catch the mouse. - Irish proverb

A dog is a man's best friend. A cat is a cat's best friend. - Robert J Vogel

The early bird may get the worm, but the second mouse gets the cheese. - Steven Wright

Dogs come when they're called; cats take a message and get back to you. - Mary Bly

Cats are intended to teach us that not everything in nature has a function. - Garrison Keillor

It is a very sad thing that nowadays there is so little useless information. - Oscar Wilde

It doesn't matter if a cat is black or white, so long as it catches mice. - Deng Xiaoping

Freedom of the press is useless when people do not understand what they read. - Gerald F Lieberman

If you hold a cat by the tail you learn things you cannot learn any other way. - Mark Twain

The main difference between a cat and a lie is that a cat only has nine lives. - Mark Twain

When we cannot find contentment in ourselves, it is useless to seek it elsewhere. - Francois de la Rochefoucauld

It is better to be a mouse in a cat's mouth than a man in a lawyer's hands. - Spanish Proverb

If man could be crossed with the cat, it would improve man, but deteriorate the cat. - Mark Twain

Cats are smarter than dogs. You can't get eight cats to pull a sled through snow. - Jeff Valdez

The cat could very well be man's best friend but would never stoop to admitting it. - Doug Larson

Without my Vulcan cat suit, Frankenstein wig and pointed ears, I don't get recognized. - Jolene Blalock

I have studied many philosophers and many cats. The wisdom of cats is infinitely superior. - Hippolyte Taine

If a farmer fills his barn with grain, he gets mice; if he leaves it empty, he gets actors. - Bill Vaughan

Women and cats will do as they please, and men and dogs should relax and get used to the idea. - Robert A. Heinlein

I went to a garage sale. "How much for the garage?" "It's not for sale." - Steven Wright

When I play with my cat, who knows whether she is not amusing herself with me more than I with her. - Montaigne

People ought to retire at 40 when they feel over-used, and go back to work at 65 when they feel useless. - Carol A O'Marie

Integrity without knowledge is weak and useless, and knowledge without integrity is dangerous and dreadful. - Samuel Johnson

I will be deafer than the blue-eyed cat, And thrice as blind as any noonday owl, To holy virgins in their ecstasies. - Alfred Tennyson

Went to Disneyland because my daughter's obsessed with Mickey Mouse. She was so excited when I got home and told her. - Ryan Reynolds

In my many years I have come to a conclusion that one useless man is a shame, two is a law firm, and three or more is a congress. - John Adams

I put contact lenses in my dog's eyes. They had little pictures of cats on them. Then I took one out and he ran around in circles. - Steven Wright