Ode To Flatulence

Poetry ‘in motion’


A fart - it is a pleasant thing,
It gives the belly ease;
It warms the bed in winter,
And suffocates the fleas.

A fart can be quiet,
A fart can be loud;
Some leave a powerful,
Poisonous cloud.

A fart can be short,
Or a fart can be long;
Some farts have been known
To sound like a song.

A fart can create
A most curious medley;
A fart can be harmless,
Or silent and deadly.

A fart might not smell,
While others are vile;
A fart may pass quickly,
Or linger a while.

A fart can occur
In a number of places;
And leave everyone there,
With strange looks on their faces.

From wide-open prairie,
To small elevators,
A fart will find all of us
Sooner or later.

But ‘farts are all bad’,
Is simply not true -
We must never forget
Sweet old farts like you!


QuotaBills
All politics is local. - Thomas P O'Neil

Politics is an inexact science. - Otto von Bismarck

Politics makes strange postmasters. - Kin Hubbard

Crime does not pay as well as politics. - Alfred E. Newman

Politics is just show business for ugly people. - Jay Leno

Politics is the art of controlling your environment. - Hunter S. Thompson

Sudafed: Brought litigation against a government official - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Government always finds a need for whatever money it gets. - Ronald Reagan

A government is the only known vessel that leaks from the top. - James Reston

A rigorous religion can be conceived and nurtured in ignorance. - Ravi Zacharias

Diplomacy is to do and say the nastiest thing in the nicest way. - Isaac Goldberg

Science is a differential equation. Religion is a boundary condition. - Alan Turing

A pretty good test of a man's religion is how it affects his pocketbook. - Francis James Grimke

There is a world of practical religion in simply being considerate of others. - Roger Babson

No science is immune to the infection of politics and the corruption of power. - Jacob Bronowski

The flood of money that gushes into politics today is a pollution of democracy. - Theodore White

The first time I sang in the Church choir, two hundred people changed their religion. - Fred Allen

I love Canada. I am from Canada. I will bash the Canadian government but never Canada. - Jason Priestley

Patriotism is supporting your country all the time and your government when it deserves it. - Mark Twain

There are two ways of disliking poetry; one way is to dislike it, the other is to read Pope. - Oscar Wilde

If religion is to be treated with intellectual respect, then it must stand the test of truth. - Ravi Zacharias

Most religious people accept medicine as a gift from God and reap the benefits of both realms. - Caroline Fraser

Men will wrangle for religion; write for it; fight for it; die for it; anything but live for it. - Charles Caleb Colton

A little government and a little luck are necessary in life, but only a fool trusts either of them. - P.J. O'Rourke

A government big enough to give you everything you want, is strong enough to take everything you have. - Thomas Jefferson

Why pay money to have your family tree traced; go into politics and your opponents will do it for you. - Unknown

Like a great Eastern religion says, it's all about striking a balance between the ping and the pong. - Kelly

A diplomat is someone who can tell you to go to hell in such a way that you will look forward to the trip. - Caskie Stinnett

The Muslim world is threatened by religious fanaticism. The Western world is threatened by secular fanaticism. - Dennis Prager

Canada's political parties spend a few years in opposition and then govern as if it's permanent payback time. - Bob Rae

Question everything. Your love, your religion, your passion. If you don't have questions, you'll never find answers. - Colleen Hoover

He who begins with Metaphysics will not only become confused in matters of religion, but will fall into complete infidelity. - Maimonides

Politics: A strife of interests masquerading as a contest of principles. The conduct of public affairs for private advantage. - Ambrose Bierce

I find that the nicest and best people generally profess no religion at all, but are ready to like the best men of all religions. - Samuel Butler

I can't swim. I can't drive, either. I was going to learn to drive but then I thought, well, what if I crash into a lake? - Dylan Moran

The workers' and peasants' government proposes to all warring peoples... negotiations leading to a just, democratic peace. - Lenin

Politics is the gentle art of getting votes from the poor and campaign funds from the rich, by promising to protect each from the other. - Oscar Ameringer

In a world of complex threats, our security and leadership depends on all elements of our power - including strong and principled diplomacy. - Barack Obama

Regarded simply as a politician, and compared with the other leading political figures of our time, how clean a smell he has managed to leave behind. - Mahatma Gandhi

The hallmark of religion is to distrust claims made for mortal men. It is in ages of great religious faith that great skepticism can find expression. - Malcolm Muggeridge


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04-Jul-2022