On Top Of Things

Grandfathers don’t know everything!


Little Johnny was 4 years old and was staying with his grandfather for a few days.

He’d been playing outside with the other kids, when he came into the house and asked , “Grandpa, what’s that called when two people sleep in the same bedroom and one is on top of the other?”

His Grandpa was a little taken aback, but he decided to tell him the truth. “Well, Little Johnny, it’s called sexual intercourse.”

“Oh, OK” Little Little Johnny said, and he went back outside to play with the other kids.

A few minutes later he came back in and angrily said, “Grandpa, it isn’t called sexual intercourse, it’s called Bunk Beds. And Jimmy’s mom wants to talk to you.”


QuotaBills
Fame is the perfume of heroic deeds. - Socrates

Fame is a fickle food upon a shifting plate. - Emily Dickinson

Assumptions are the termites of relationships. - Henry Winkler

Winning takes talent, to repeat takes character. - John Wooden

Appropriate rules cultivate a disciplined character. - Bill Welker

Public behavior is merely private character writ large. - Stephen Covey

When you have to kill a man, it costs nothing to be polite. - Winston Churchill

The power of forgiveness transcends personal relationships. - Eric Metaxas

Persistence is to the character of man as carbon is to steel. - Napoleon Hill

A man's manner to a certain extent indicates his character. - Samuel Smiles

Nothing shows a man's character more than what he laughs at. - Johann Wolfgang von Goethe

The great myth of our times is that technology is communication. - Libby Larsen

Nothing of character is really permanent but virtue and personal worth. - Daniel Webster

Every politician should have been born an orphan and remain a bachelor. - Lady Bird Johnson

While your circumstances are beyond your control, your character is not. - John C Maxwell

I wanted a man who wouldn't stray so I'm dating a guy on house arrest. - Kim Bove

The woman who can create her own job is the one who will win fame and fortune. - Amelia Earhart

The true test of a man's character is what he does when no one is watching. - John Wooden

You can tell a lot about a fellow's character by his way of eating jellybeans. - Ronald Reagan

You cannot dream yourself into a character; you must hammer and forge yourself one. - Henry David Thoreau

Many a man's reputation would not know his character if they met on the street. - Elbert Hubbard

A man never discloses his own character so clearly as when he describes another's. - Jean Paul Richter

There is nothing in which people more betray their character than in what they laugh at. - Johann Wolfgang von Goethe

It requires less character to discover the faults of others than is does to tolerate them. - J. Petit Senn

I am on your Walk of Fame in Toronto. My sense of humour is Canadian. But I can't vote. - Donald Sutherland

A true relationship is when you can tell each other anything and everything. No secrets, no lies. - Unknown

Nearly all men can stand adversity, but if you want to test a man's character, give him power. - Abraham Lincoln

Character is that which reveals moral purposes, exposing the class of things man chooses or avoids. - Aristotle

Pigeons are gentle and smart and have complex social relationships. Their hearing and vision are both excellent. - Ingrid Newkirk

Character is like a tree and reputation like a shadow. The shadow is what we think of it; the tree is the real thing. - Abraham Lincoln

Every human being is intended to have a character of his own; to be what no others are, and to do what no other can do. - William Henry Channing

Any fool can criticize, condemn and complain but it takes character and self control to be understanding and forgiving. - Dale Carnegie

The main business of a lawyer is to take the romance, the mystery, the irony, the ambiguity out of everything he touches. - Antonin Scalia

True faith rests upon the character of God and asks no further proof than the moral perfections of the One who cannot lie. - A.W. Tozer

Twenty years of romance make a woman look like a ruin, but twenty years of marriage make her something like a public building. - Oscar Wilde

From a shy, timid girl I had become a woman of resolute character, who could no longer be frightened by the struggle with troubles. - Anna Dostoevsky

Education commences on the mother's knee, and every word spoken within hearsay of little children tends toward the formation of character. - Hosea Ballou

Every man, as to character, is the creature of the age in which he lives. Very few are able to raise themselves above the ideas of their times. - Voltaire

You don't develop courage by being happy in your relationships everyday. You develop it by surviving difficult times and challenging adversity. - Epicurus

This 'telephone' has too many shortcomings to be seriously considered as a means of communication. The device is inherently of no value to us. - Unknown


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19-Jan-2021