U.S. Navy Ships

“I saw these ships come sailing in...”

Ships in U.S. naval history



USS Ronald Reagan
Seeing it next to the Arizona Memorial really puts its size into perspective
USS Reagan

When the Bridge pipes “Man the Rail”, there’s a lot of rail to man on this monster:
shoulder to shoulder, around 4.5 acres. Her displacement is 100,000 tons
with full complement.

Capability
Top speed exceeds 30 knots, powered by two nuclear reactors that can operate for
more than 20 years without refueling.
1. Expected to operate in the fleet for about 50 years
2. Carries over 80 combat aircraft
3. Three arresting cables can stop a 28-ton aircraft going 150 miles per hour
in less than 400 feet

Size
1. Towers 20 stories above the waterline
2. 1092 feet long - nearly as long as the Empire State Building is tall
3. Flight deck covers 4.5 acres
4. 4 bronze propellers, each 21 feet across, weighing 66,200 pounds
5. 2 rudders, each 29 by 22 feet, weighing 50 tons
6. 4 high speed aircraft elevators, each over 4,000 square feet

Capacity
1. Home to 6,000 Navy personnel
2. Carries enough food and supplies to operate for 90 days
3. 18,150 meals served daily
4. Distillation plants provide 400,000 gallons of fresh water from
sea water daily, enough for 2,000 homes
5. Nearly 30,000 light fixtures, 1,325 miles of cable, and 1,400 telephones
6. 14,000 pillowcases and 28,000 sheets


USS Jimmy Carter
USS Jimmy Carter

The USS Jimmy Carter is a secret aircraft carrier, based on
Canada’s STOL (Short Takeoff and Landing) technology.
It’s so secret that noone knows whether it did “takeoff.”

USS William Jefferson Clinton
USS Clinton

The USS William Jefferson Clinton set sail today from its home port of Vancouver, B.C.

The ship is the first of its kind in the Navy and is a standing legacy to President Bill Clinton
“for his foresight in military budget cuts” and his conduct while formerly holding
the office of President.

The ship is constructed nearly entirely from recycled aluminum and is completely solar
powered with a top speed of 5 knots. It boasts an arsenal comprised of one unarmed
F14 Tomcat or one unarmed F18 Hornet aircraft which, although they cannot be
launched from the 100 foot flight deck, form a very menacing presence.

As a standing order, there are no firearms allowed on board.
This crew, like the crew aboard the USS Jimmy Carter, is specially trained to avoid
conflicts and appease any and all enemies of the United States at all costs.

An onboard Type One DNC Universal Translator can send out messages of apology in
any language to anyone who may find America offensive. The number of apologies are
limitless and though some may seem hollow and disingenuous, the Navy advises
all apologies will sound very sincere.

In times of conflict, the USS Clinton has orders to seek refuge in Canada.


USS Barack Hussein Obama
USS Barack Hussein Obama

Details are vague. But don’t worry - he has a plan.



QuotaBills
Politics makes strange red-fellows. - Will Rogers

In politics nothing is contemptible. - Benjamin Disraeli

I hope my ship comes in before my dock rots. - Unknown

From politics, it was an easy step to silence. - Jane Austen

A government of law is a government of lawyers. - Saying

If your ship doesn't come in, swim out to it. - Jonathan Winters

Turn on to politics, or politics will turn on you. - Ralph Nader

Politics is the art of controlling your environment. - Hunter S. Thompson

Most bad government results from too much government. - Thomas Jefferson

The art of government is the organization of idolatry. - George Bernard Shaw

In politics, a lie unanswered becomes truth within 24 hours. - Willie Brown

Every decent man is ashamed of the government he lives under. - H L Mencken

I wish the government would put a tax on pianos for the incompetent. - Edith Sitwell

Politics is a profession where the paths of glory lead but to the gravy. - Billy Boy Franklin

Be thankful we're not getting all the government we're paying for. - Will Rogers

To lodge all power in one party and keep it there is to insure bad government. - Mark Twain

When rats leave a sinking ship, where exactly do they think they're going? - Douglas Gauck

The flood of money that gushes into politics today is a pollution of democracy. - Theodore White

American Politics: A form of socialism for the rich, including the politicians. - Gregory Nunn

Ideas are great arrows, but there has to be a bow. And politics is the bow of idealism. - Bill Moyers

I believe there is something out there watching us. Unfortunately, it's the government. - Woody Allen

When I was a child, I wanted to raise horses in Wyoming or be a cabin boy on a pirate ship. - Sadie Jones

What is the first part of politics? Education. The second? Education. And the third? Education. - Jules Michelet

The single most exciting thing you encounter in government is competence, because it's so rare. - Daniel P Moynihan

I must study politics and war that my sons may have the liberty to study mathematics and philosophy. - John Adams

Ex-Presidents of the United States get state subsidies. Not so in Russia. You get no government support. - Mikhail Gorbachev

One of the key problems today is that politics is such a disgrace, good people don't go into government. - Donald Trump

Relying on the government to protect your privacy is like asking a peeping tom to install your window blinds. - John P Barlow

One of the penalties for refusing to participate in politics is that you end up being governed by your inferiors. - Plato

Our whole constitutional heritage rebels at the thought of giving government the power to control men's minds. - Thurgood Marshall

Harold MacMillan is a very intelligent man, who, as so often happens in politics, achieved supreme power too late. - Malcolm Muggeridge

Politics is the only business where doing nothing other than making the other guy look bad is an acceptable outcome. - Mark Warner

I am sometimes a fox and sometimes a lion. The whole secret of government lies in knowing when to be the one or the other. - Napoleon Bonaparte

One lesson you better learn if you want to be in politics is that you never go out on a golf course and beat the President. - Lyndon B. Johnson

Politics is not a bad profession. If you succeed there are many rewards, if you disgrace yourself you can always write a book. - Ronald Reagan

When one may pay out over two million dollars to presidential and Congressional campaigns, the U.S. government is virtually up for sale. - John W. Gardner

When I am abroad, I always make it a rule never to criticize or attack the government of my country. I make up for lost time when I am at home. - Winston Churchill

If you make any money, the government shoves you in the creek once a year with it in your pockets, and all that don't get wet you can keep. - Will Rogers

Ever occur to you why some of us can be this much concerned with animals suffering? Because government is not. Why not? Animals don't vote. - Paul Harvey

Our ancestors believed in magic, prayers, trickery, browbeating and bullying. I think it would be fair to sum that up as 'Irish politics'. - Flann O'Brien


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24-Sep-2020