A monastery was perched high on an isolated cliff, and the only way to reach it was to ride in a basket which was hauled to the top by a team of monks.
The ride up was not for the faint-hearted, and one visitor was looking exceedingly pale by the time he reached the summit. As he stepped trembling from the basket, he couldn’t help noticing that the rope was old and frayed.
“How often do you change that rope?” he asked one of the monks.
The monk thought for a moment and answered brusquely, “Whenever it breaks.”
Off-the-docks Jews (Orthodox Jews) - Archie Bunker
There is no substitute for the Bible. - Henry Halley
Religion is the opiate of the masses. - Karl Marx
Profit: Religious guy who talks to God - Daffynitions joe-ks.com
Holy Mackerel: Fish served at Church supper - Daffynitions joe-ks.com
Sex at the age of 90 is like playing billiards with a rope. - Camille Paglia
True religion is the life we lead, not the creed we profess. - Louis Nizer
If men are so wicked with religion, what would they be without it? - Benjamin Franklin
I see religion more as a truck stop on your way to figuring out who you are. - Brad Pitt
The Bible does not give us a road map for life, but it does give us a compass. - Gordon S. Jackson
Church is the only society on earth that exists for the benefit of non-members. - William Temple
I won't take my religion from any man who never works except with his mouth. - Carl Sandburg
You can always borrow a corkscrew from a member of the Protestant Episcopal Church. - Chauncey Depew
To be religious is to have a life that flows with the presence of the extraordinary. - Ann Belford Ulanov
A religion that gives nothing, costs nothing, and suffers nothing, is worth nothing. - Martin Luther
The first time I sang in the Church choir, two hundred people changed their religion. - Fred Allen
Are you saying that the Rebel Alliance were religious terrorists and Yoda was a benefit cheat? - Dave Turner
Let's just say, I'm Irish. I grew up in the 1950s. Religion had a very tight iron fist. - Liam Neeson
Celebrate what you've accomplished, but raise the bar a little higher each time you succeed. - Mia Hamm
I am the indoctrinated child of two lapsed Irish Catholics. Which is to say: I am not religious. - Meghan O'Rourke
Men will wrangle for religion; write for it; fight for it; die for it; anything but live for it. - Charles Caleb Colton
Let us build a church so great that those who come after us may thing us mad to have attempted it. - Unknown
When you come to religion, you come to a place. When you come to Jesus Christ, you come to a person. - Ravi Zacharias
He made us all one true religion, Edith, which he named after his son, Christian - or Christ, for short. - Archie Bunker
Like a great Eastern religion says, it's all about striking a balance between the ping and the pong. - Kelly
I have an everyday religion that works for me. Love yourself first, and everything else falls in to line. - Lucille Ball
Family, religion, friendship... these are the three demons you must slay if you wish to succeed in business. - Mr. Burns
The whole religious complexion of the modern world is due to the absence from Jerusalem of a lunatic asylum. - Havelock Ellis
The bulletin board on the lawn of a New Jersey Church reads "We reserve the right to accept everybody." - John Kazmark
The Bible tells us to love our neighbors, and also to love our enemies; probably because they are the same people. - G K Chesterton
Dieting is not a sprint, it's a marathon. If you celebrate the small victories, you will eventually win the war. - Ian K Smith
Anyone who thinks sitting in church can make you a Christian must also think that sitting in a garage can make you a car. - Garrison Keillor
Everyone has their preferred stroller, their preferred crib, their preferred Moses basket. And they have advice on that too! - Tori Spelling
I find that the nicest and best people generally profess no religion at all, but are ready to like the best men of all religions. - Samuel Butler
Basketball, a game which won’t be fit for people until they set the basket umbilicus high and return the giraffes to the zoo. - Ogden Nash
Prayer and the Bible became a part of my everyday thoughts and beliefs. I learned to put my trust in God and to seek Him as my strength. - Rosa Parks
Some keep the Sabbath going to Church
I keep it, staying at Home
With a Bobolink for a Chorister
And an Orchard for a Dome - Emily Dickinson
Ultimately, America's answer to the intolerant man is diversity, the very diversity which our heritage of religious freedom has inspired. - Robert F. Kennedy
Starbucks says they are going to start putting religious quotes on cups. The very first one will say, 'Jesus! This cup is expensive!' - Conan O'Brien
I you can make any leading religion of the world look like complete nonsense, you can be sure of only one thing: you haven't understood it. - Wilfred Cantwell Smith
There is no substitute for the Bible. - Henry Halley
Religion is the opiate of the masses. - Karl Marx
Profit: Religious guy who talks to God - Daffynitions joe-ks.com
Holy Mackerel: Fish served at Church supper - Daffynitions joe-ks.com
Sex at the age of 90 is like playing billiards with a rope. - Camille Paglia
True religion is the life we lead, not the creed we profess. - Louis Nizer
If men are so wicked with religion, what would they be without it? - Benjamin Franklin
I see religion more as a truck stop on your way to figuring out who you are. - Brad Pitt
The Bible does not give us a road map for life, but it does give us a compass. - Gordon S. Jackson
Church is the only society on earth that exists for the benefit of non-members. - William Temple
I won't take my religion from any man who never works except with his mouth. - Carl Sandburg
You can always borrow a corkscrew from a member of the Protestant Episcopal Church. - Chauncey Depew
To be religious is to have a life that flows with the presence of the extraordinary. - Ann Belford Ulanov
A religion that gives nothing, costs nothing, and suffers nothing, is worth nothing. - Martin Luther
The first time I sang in the Church choir, two hundred people changed their religion. - Fred Allen
Are you saying that the Rebel Alliance were religious terrorists and Yoda was a benefit cheat? - Dave Turner
Let's just say, I'm Irish. I grew up in the 1950s. Religion had a very tight iron fist. - Liam Neeson
Celebrate what you've accomplished, but raise the bar a little higher each time you succeed. - Mia Hamm
I am the indoctrinated child of two lapsed Irish Catholics. Which is to say: I am not religious. - Meghan O'Rourke
Men will wrangle for religion; write for it; fight for it; die for it; anything but live for it. - Charles Caleb Colton
Let us build a church so great that those who come after us may thing us mad to have attempted it. - Unknown
When you come to religion, you come to a place. When you come to Jesus Christ, you come to a person. - Ravi Zacharias
He made us all one true religion, Edith, which he named after his son, Christian - or Christ, for short. - Archie Bunker
Like a great Eastern religion says, it's all about striking a balance between the ping and the pong. - Kelly
I have an everyday religion that works for me. Love yourself first, and everything else falls in to line. - Lucille Ball
Family, religion, friendship... these are the three demons you must slay if you wish to succeed in business. - Mr. Burns
The whole religious complexion of the modern world is due to the absence from Jerusalem of a lunatic asylum. - Havelock Ellis
The bulletin board on the lawn of a New Jersey Church reads "We reserve the right to accept everybody." - John Kazmark
The Bible tells us to love our neighbors, and also to love our enemies; probably because they are the same people. - G K Chesterton
Dieting is not a sprint, it's a marathon. If you celebrate the small victories, you will eventually win the war. - Ian K Smith
Anyone who thinks sitting in church can make you a Christian must also think that sitting in a garage can make you a car. - Garrison Keillor
Everyone has their preferred stroller, their preferred crib, their preferred Moses basket. And they have advice on that too! - Tori Spelling
I find that the nicest and best people generally profess no religion at all, but are ready to like the best men of all religions. - Samuel Butler
Basketball, a game which won’t be fit for people until they set the basket umbilicus high and return the giraffes to the zoo. - Ogden Nash
Prayer and the Bible became a part of my everyday thoughts and beliefs. I learned to put my trust in God and to seek Him as my strength. - Rosa Parks
Some keep the Sabbath going to Church
I keep it, staying at Home
With a Bobolink for a Chorister
And an Orchard for a Dome - Emily Dickinson
Ultimately, America's answer to the intolerant man is diversity, the very diversity which our heritage of religious freedom has inspired. - Robert F. Kennedy
Starbucks says they are going to start putting religious quotes on cups. The very first one will say, 'Jesus! This cup is expensive!' - Conan O'Brien
I you can make any leading religion of the world look like complete nonsense, you can be sure of only one thing: you haven't understood it. - Wilfred Cantwell Smith
see also Religious, Stress & Survivor Sections
Celebate or Celebrate?
Friar Thumper
Gambling Chips
Greek Monk
Monk’s Christmas Vow
Monk’s Fish And Chip Stand
Monk’s Story
Silent Monks Singing Hallelujah
Tiny Monks
 Open Drive Through |  Secret Revealed |  Tired Flagpole |  Bent Car Sculpture |  Cow Jacket |
 Thanks For Noticing |  Overflow Truck Garden |  Beach Sign Training |  Encouraging Seal |  GMC Pool |
 Nature Calls |  You're Home Early |  New Nail Gun |  Long Noodles |  EMS Upgrade |
 No Pot Of Gold |  Graduation Swag |  Monkeypox |  Pre-Dinner Photography |  Curses, Foiled Again |
24-May-2022 |