After-Gas Piggy Bank

He who marries for money earns it. - Hebrew Proverb

Bloods’ not thicker than money. - Groucho Marx

When money speaks, truth keeps silent. - Russian Proverb

Stocks do not move unless they are pushed. - S Jay Levin

A rich man is nothing but a poor man with money. - WC Fields

To shorten winter, borrow some money due in spring. - W.J. Vogel

Don't marry for money, you can borrow it cheaper. - Scottish Saying

Being rich is having money, being wealthy is having time. - Stephen Swid

A grandfather carries pictures where his money used to be. - Joe-kster

Why is the man who invests all your money called a broker? - George Carlin

Enjoy money while you have it. Shrouds don't have pockets. - Virginia Esberg

Money is like manure. You have to spread it around or it smells. - J Paul Getty

If you can count your money, you don't have a billion dollars. - J Paul Getty

I was a great student at a great school, Wharton School of Finance. - Donald Trump

I don't trust a bank that would lend money to such a poor risk. - Robert Benchley

All I ask is the chance to prove that money can't make me happy. - Spike Milligan

The way to make money is to buy when blood is running in the streets. - John D Rockefeller

If all the nations in the world are in debt, where did all the money go? - Steven Wright

Stress is an ignorant state. It believes that everything is an emergency. - Natalie Goldberg

Money can't buy you friends, but you can get a better class of enemy. - Spike Milligan

I have enough money to last me the rest of my life, unless I buy something. - Jackie Mason

Retirement means no pressure, no stress, no heartache... unless you play golf. - Gene Perret

The first rule is not to lose money. The second rule is not to forget the first rule. - Warren Buffett

It's better to do nothing with your money than something you don't understand. - Suze Orman

Shopping: The fine art of acquiring things you don't need with money you don't have. - Unknown

Half the money I spend on advertising is wasted; the trouble is, I don't know which half. - John Wannamaker

In Las Vegas, a man said to his wife, "Give me the money I told you not to give me." - Henny Youngman

It isn't enough for you to love money - it's also necessary that money should love you. - Kin Hubbard

I actually lost 90 pounds over the course of 15 months in order to save money on life insurance. - Derek Kilmer

I'm proud to be paying taxes. The only thing is, I could be just as proud for half the money. - Arthur Godfrey

Every two months, I would get an email, 'Skeleton Twins update: still don't have the money!' - Bill Hader

All right, let's not panic. I'll make the money by selling one of my livers. I can get by with one. - Homer Simpson

Why does not the Pope build St. Peter's with his own money, rather than with the money of poor believers? - Martin Luther

Success isn't measured by money or power or social rank. Success is measured by your discipline and inner peace. - Mike Ditka

I've never sought success in order to get fame and money; it's the talent and the passion that count in success. - Ingrid Bergman

It would be nice to spend billions on schools and roads, but right now that money is desperately needed for political ads. - Andy Borowitz

A fruit is a vegetable with looks and money. Plus, if you let fruit rot, it turns into wine; something Brussels Sprouts never do. - P.J. O'Rourke

It's not about money or connections. It's the willingness to outwork and outlearn everyone when it comes to your business. - Mark Cuban

There are lots of things in life that money won't buy, but it's very funny - have you ever tried to buy them without money? - Ogden Nash

Only when the last tree has withered, and the last fish caught, and the last river been poisoned, will we realize we cannot eat money. - Cree Proverb