After having failed his exam in “Logistics and Organization”, a student goes and confronts his lecturer about it.
Student: “Sir, do you really understand anything about the subject?”
Professor: “Surely I must. Otherwise I would not be a professor!”
Student: “Great, well then I would like to ask you a question. If you can give me the correct answer, I will accept my mark as is and go. If you however do not know the answer, I want you give me an ‘A’ for the exam.”
Professor: “Okay, it’s a deal. So what is the question?”
Student: “What is legal, but not logical, logical, but not legal, and neither logical, nor legal?”
Even after some long and hard consideration, the professor cannot give the student an answer, and therefore changes his exam mark into an ‘A’, as agreed.
Afterwards, the professor calls on his best student and asks him the same question.
He immediately answers: “Sir, you are 63 years old and married to a 35 year old woman, which is legal, but not logical. Your wife has a 25 year old lover, which is logical, but not legal. The fact that you have given your wife’s lover an ‘A’, although he really should have failed, is neither legal, nor logical.”
There is no failure except in no longer trying. - Kin Hubbard
Pedestrian: a man whose son is home from college. - Unknown
It's not failure. It's unfinished success. - Unknown
Success has a thousand fathers, and failure is an orphan. - Alan Price
Once you can accept failure, you can have fun and success. - Rickey Henderson
A college education shows a man how little other people know. - T.C. Hailburton
Every failure brings with it the seed of an equivalent success. - Napoleon Hill
Walking has been ridiculous in college basketball the past 15 years. - Bobby Knight
There is a country in Europe where multiple-choice tests are illegal. - Sigfried Hulzer
If you're gonna be a failure, at least be one at something you enjoy. - Sylvester Stallone
Never let success get to your head. Never let failure get to your health. - Unknown
The greatest test of courage on earth is to bear defeat without losing heart. - Robert Ingersoll
You teach a child to read, and he or her will be able to pass a literacy test. - George W. Bush
If you're willing to fail interestingly, you tend to succeed interestingly. - Edward Albee
It is not a disgrace to fail. Failing is one of the greatest arts in the world. - Charles Kettering
The only time you don't fail is the last time you try anything - and it works. - William Strong
I'd rather be a failure at something I love than a success at something I hate. - George Burns
The college graduate is presented with a sheepskin to cover his intellectual nakedness. - Robert M. Hutchins
I study myself more than any other subject. That is my metaphysics, that is my physics, - Michel de Montaigne
The guns and the bombs, the rockets and the warships, are all symbols of human failure. - Lyndon B Johnson
He who devotes 16 hours a day to hard study may become as wise at 60 as he thought himself at 20. - Mary Wilson Little
It's better to be a failure at something you love than to be a success at something you hate. - George Burns
One of the tests of leadership is the ability to recognize a problem before it becomes an emergency. - Arnold H. Glasow
I learned law so well, the day I graduated I used the college, won the case, and got my tuition back. - Fred Allen
The main cause for failure and unhappiness is trading what you want most for what you want at the moment. - Unknown
Life is full of screwups. You're supposed to fail sometimes. It's a required part of the human existence. - Sarah Dessen
Aftermath: 1. The period following algebra; 2. The horrible headache you have when you've finished the algebra test. - Daffynitions joe-ks.com
I cannot give you the formula for success, but I can give you the formula for failure, which is: Try to please everybody. - Herbert B Swope
A convention is a splendid place to study human nature. Man in a crowd is quite a different creature than man acting alone. - William Jennings Bryan
Those who fail to learn from the brutal stompings visited on them in the past are doomed to be brutally stomped in the future. - Hunter S Thompson
I think sleeping was my problem in school. If school had started at four in the afternoon, I'd be a college graduate today. - George Foreman
Failure is not a single cataclysmic event. You don't fail overnight. Instead, failure is a few errors in judgment, repeated every day. - Jim Rohn
I love to play hide and seek with my kid, but some days my goal is to find a hiding place where he can't find me until after high school. - Unknown
Restlessness is discontent, and discontent is the first necessity of progress. Show me a thoroughly satisfied man, and I'll show you a failure. - Thomas Edison
I was thrown out of college during my freshman year, for cheating on my metaphysics final - I looked within the soul of the boy sitting next to me. - Woody Allen
Graduation speeches were invented largely in the belief that college students should never be released into the world until they have been properly sedated. - Garry Trudeau
If you want to succeed, worry less about what college you get into and more about doing your homework, taking care of your chores and being nice to other people. - Jay Mathews
If men could regard the events of their own lives with more open minds they would frequently discover that they did not really desire the things they failed to obtain. - Andre Maurois
For one human being to love another - that is perhaps the most difficult of our tasks: the ultimate, the last test and proof, the work for which all other work is but preparation. - Rainer M Riike
I have been studying the traits and dispositions of the 'lower animals' (so called) and contrasting them with the traits and dispositions of man. I find the result humilitating to me. - Mark Twain
Pedestrian: a man whose son is home from college. - Unknown
It's not failure. It's unfinished success. - Unknown
Success has a thousand fathers, and failure is an orphan. - Alan Price
Once you can accept failure, you can have fun and success. - Rickey Henderson
A college education shows a man how little other people know. - T.C. Hailburton
Every failure brings with it the seed of an equivalent success. - Napoleon Hill
Walking has been ridiculous in college basketball the past 15 years. - Bobby Knight
There is a country in Europe where multiple-choice tests are illegal. - Sigfried Hulzer
If you're gonna be a failure, at least be one at something you enjoy. - Sylvester Stallone
Never let success get to your head. Never let failure get to your health. - Unknown
The greatest test of courage on earth is to bear defeat without losing heart. - Robert Ingersoll
You teach a child to read, and he or her will be able to pass a literacy test. - George W. Bush
If you're willing to fail interestingly, you tend to succeed interestingly. - Edward Albee
It is not a disgrace to fail. Failing is one of the greatest arts in the world. - Charles Kettering
The only time you don't fail is the last time you try anything - and it works. - William Strong
I'd rather be a failure at something I love than a success at something I hate. - George Burns
The college graduate is presented with a sheepskin to cover his intellectual nakedness. - Robert M. Hutchins
I study myself more than any other subject. That is my metaphysics, that is my physics, - Michel de Montaigne
The guns and the bombs, the rockets and the warships, are all symbols of human failure. - Lyndon B Johnson
He who devotes 16 hours a day to hard study may become as wise at 60 as he thought himself at 20. - Mary Wilson Little
It's better to be a failure at something you love than to be a success at something you hate. - George Burns
One of the tests of leadership is the ability to recognize a problem before it becomes an emergency. - Arnold H. Glasow
I learned law so well, the day I graduated I used the college, won the case, and got my tuition back. - Fred Allen
The main cause for failure and unhappiness is trading what you want most for what you want at the moment. - Unknown
Life is full of screwups. You're supposed to fail sometimes. It's a required part of the human existence. - Sarah Dessen
Aftermath: 1. The period following algebra; 2. The horrible headache you have when you've finished the algebra test. - Daffynitions joe-ks.com
I cannot give you the formula for success, but I can give you the formula for failure, which is: Try to please everybody. - Herbert B Swope
A convention is a splendid place to study human nature. Man in a crowd is quite a different creature than man acting alone. - William Jennings Bryan
Those who fail to learn from the brutal stompings visited on them in the past are doomed to be brutally stomped in the future. - Hunter S Thompson
I think sleeping was my problem in school. If school had started at four in the afternoon, I'd be a college graduate today. - George Foreman
Failure is not a single cataclysmic event. You don't fail overnight. Instead, failure is a few errors in judgment, repeated every day. - Jim Rohn
I love to play hide and seek with my kid, but some days my goal is to find a hiding place where he can't find me until after high school. - Unknown
Restlessness is discontent, and discontent is the first necessity of progress. Show me a thoroughly satisfied man, and I'll show you a failure. - Thomas Edison
I was thrown out of college during my freshman year, for cheating on my metaphysics final - I looked within the soul of the boy sitting next to me. - Woody Allen
Graduation speeches were invented largely in the belief that college students should never be released into the world until they have been properly sedated. - Garry Trudeau
If you want to succeed, worry less about what college you get into and more about doing your homework, taking care of your chores and being nice to other people. - Jay Mathews
If men could regard the events of their own lives with more open minds they would frequently discover that they did not really desire the things they failed to obtain. - Andre Maurois
For one human being to love another - that is perhaps the most difficult of our tasks: the ultimate, the last test and proof, the work for which all other work is but preparation. - Rainer M Riike
I have been studying the traits and dispositions of the 'lower animals' (so called) and contrasting them with the traits and dispositions of man. I find the result humilitating to me. - Mark Twain
see also College Section
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Audible Sobs
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How To Prevent Cheating
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