Joe’s  “Dear Abby” Page

Uniform: Sheep's clothing - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Lawsuits: Clothes worn by an attorney - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Life is a relationship between molecules. - Linus Pauling

Compromises are for relationships, not wine. - Robert S Caywood

Don't give advice unless you're asked. - Amy Alcott

Diets, like clothes, should be tailored to you. - Joan Rivers

A good scare is worth more to a man than good advice. - Edgar Watson Howe

Deceiving others. That is what the world calls a romance. - Oscar Wilde

He has a woman's name and wears makeup. How original. - Alice Cooper

Advice is like mushrooms. The wrong kind can prove fatal. - Charles E McKenzie

I'll cry at the end of the day, not with fresh makeup. - Kim Kardashian

Hand Scanner: Singles bar prowler looking for wedding rings - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

A bachelor is one who enjoys the chase but does not eat the game. - Unknown

Real magic in relationships means an absence of judgment of others. - Wayne Dyer

She wears her clothes as if they were thrown on her with a pitchfork. - Jonathan Swift

Advice is like kissing: it costs nothing and is a pleasant thing to do. - H.W. Shaw

Excise: The clothes hanging in your closet that fit before the holidays. - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

"Be Yourself" is about the worst advice you can give to people. - Mark Twain

Good advice is something a man gives when he is too old to set a bad example. - Francois de La Rochefoucauld

When I get a little money, I buy books. If any is left, I buy food and clothes. - Erasmus

The most beautiful makeup for a woman is passion. But cosmetics are easier to buy. - Yves St. Laurent

I advise you to go on living solely to enrage those who are paying your annuities. - Voltaire

My movies are usually about stripping off the makeup, getting down to the skeleton. - Michael Douglas

My advice would be if you want to pursue a career in the music business, don't. - Simon Cowell

Advice from your friends is like the weather, some of it is good, some of it is bad. - Unknown

Never give advice unless you have walked the walk, because anybody can talk the talk. - Valencia Mackie

Every father should remember one day his son will follow his example, not his advice. - Charles Kettering

An almost perfect relationship with his father was the earthly root of all his wisdom. - C S Lewis

As a man in a relationship, you have a simple choice: You can be right or you can be happy. - Ralphie May

A doctor can bury his mistakes but an architect can only advise his clients to plant vines. - Frank Lloyd Wright

Somehow a bachelor never quite gets over the idea that he is a thing of beauty and a boy forever. - Helen Rowland

Biographies are but the clothes and buttons of the man. The biography of the man himself cannot be written. - Mark Twain

Going without food or water will kill the body, but the lack of relationship will kill the minds and spirit. - David Jeremiah

Valentine's Day: Rubbing singles' noses in their lack of a mate and the noses of couples in their lack of time. - Emma McLaughlin

Everyone has their preferred stroller, their preferred crib, their preferred Moses basket. And they have advice on that too! - Tori Spelling

It is the eye of other people that ruin us. If I were blind I would want, neither fine clothes, fine houses or fine furniture. - Benjamin Franklin

Here's good advice for practice: go into partnership with nature; she does more than half the work and asks none of the fee. - Martin H. Fischer

It's really hard to maintain a one-on-one relationship if the other person is not going to allow me to be with other people. - Axl Rose

A problem occurs when people want the benefits of a relationship with God without the responsibilities of a relationship with God. - Jim Herring

The best time to give advice to your children is while they're still young enough to believe you know what you're talking about. - Evan Esar