![]() How to tell if an antique Antique Car has been on the Road too long Afford: Popular type of car - Daffynitions joe-ks.com Khaki: A thing for starting a car - Daffynitions joe-ks.com Chop your own path. Get off the car track. - A.Y. Jackson Didn't he take the exercise tax off cars? - Archie Bunker Never invest emergency savings in the stock market. - Suze Orman Never lend your car to anyone to whom you have given birth. - Erma Bombeck Giving never happens by accident. It's always intentional. - Amy Grant I had to stop driving my car for a while - the tires got dizzy. - Steven Wright We all thought we'd have flying cars by now, but we don't. - Dana Brunetti Happiness is an accident of nature, a beautiful and flawless aberration. - Pat Conroy I aimed at the public's heart and by accident I hit it in the stomach. - Upton Sinclair A private railroad car is not an acquired taste. One takes to it immediately. - Eleanor R. Belmont There is nothing so strong or safe in an emergency of life as the simple truth. - Charles Dickens I've exercised with women so thin that buzzards followed them to their cars. - Erma Bombeck Fame is a vapor; popularity an accident; the only earthly certainty is oblivion. - Mark Twain When a man opens a car door for his wife, it's either a new car or a new wife. - Prince Philip The lead car is absolutely unique, except for the one behind it which is identical. - Murray Walker Giving money and power to government is like giving whiskey and car keys to teenage boys. - P.J. O'Rourke Yesterday I parked my car in a tow-away zone... when I came back the entire area was missing. - Steven Wright If you're not paying for it through the health plan, you pay for it in the emergency room. - David Lehman The lead car is absolutely, truly unique, except for the one behind it which is exactly identical. - Murray Walker Police officers may drive black and white cars, however what goes on in their job is a lot of gray. - Arik Matson The greatest pleasure I know is to do a good action by stealth, and to have it found out by accident. - Charles Lamb If I weren't skateboarding, I'd love to race cars. I like anything that's fast and active. - Ryan Sheckler I don't think I'm a celebrity. I'm just a guy from east Texas who loves cars and airplanes. - Carroll Shelby Women are like cars: we all want a Ferrari, sometimes want a pick-up truck, and end up with a station wagon. - Tim Allen Poverty: 1. A state of mind sometimes induced by a neighbour's new car; 2. One thing that money can't buy. - Daffynitions joe-ks.com I hooked up my accelerator pedal in my car to my brake lights. I hit the gas, people behind me stop, and I'm gone. - Steven Wright Menopause: because nature decided that pregnancy, labor, delivery, breastfeeding, and stretch marks wasn't enough. - Unknown The actual building of roads devoted to motor cars is not for the near future, in spite of many rumors to that effect. - Harper's Weekly If GM had kept up with technology like the computer industry has, we would all be driving $25 cars that got 2,000 MPG. - Bill Gates It's a sad day when you find out that it's not accident or fortune but just yourself that kept things from you. - Lillian Hellman I do get scared of the dentist, so a drive-through dentist might make me feel more at home. If I got to stay in my car. - Jessica Pare I'm not a car guy. The subway gets me where I need to go efficiently and cheaply, and I don't worry about traffic. - Joe Scarborough Is fuel efficiency really what we need most desperately? I say what we really need is a car that can be shot when it breaks down. - George Carlin When I die, I want to go peacefully like my grandfather did, in his sleep. Not screaming and yelling like the passengers in his car. - Unknown Tonight we'll be talking to a car designer who's crossed Toyota with Quasimodo and come up with the Hatchback of Notre Dame. - Ronnie Corbett I have an answering machine in my car. It says, "I'm home now. But leave a message and I'll call when I'm out." - Steven Wright A car hits a Jewish man. The paramedic rushes over and says, "Are you comfortable?" The guy says, "I make a good living." - Henny Youngman The best way to meet a woman is in an emergency situation - if you're in a shipwreck, or you find yourself behind enemy lines, or in a flood. - Mark Helprin |
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