Dorothy Parker Quotes from joe-ks.com
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Drink and dance and laugh and lie,
Love, the reeling midnight through,
For tomorrow we shall die!
(But, alas, we never do.)

If you want to know what God thinks of money, just look at the people he gave it to.

Men seldom make passes
At girls who wear glasses.

I require only three things of a man. He must be handsome, ruthless, and stupid.

His voice was intimate as the rustle of sheets.

Take me or leave me, or, as is the usual order of things, both.

This is not a novel to be tossed aside lightly. It should be thrown with great force.

Excuse My Dust
suggested epitaph for herself

Scratch a lover, and find a foe.

I don't care what is written about me so long as it isn't true.

If all the young ladies who attended the Yale prom were laid end to end, no one would be the least surprised.

Salary is no object: I want only enough to keep body and soul apart.

Brevity is the soul of lingerie.

She runs the gamut of emotions from A to B.
(on Katharine Hepburn's acting prowess in the 1930s)

You can't teach an old dogma new tricks.

Every love's the love before in a duller dress.

They sicken of the calm who know the storm.

Drunk Man: "I can't bear fools."
Dorothy Parker: "Apparently your mother could."

I'd rather have a bottle in front of me than a frontal lobotomy.

Women and elephants never forget.

A little bad taste is like a nice dash of paprika.

The most beautiful words in the English language are "cheque enclosed".

The cure for boredom is curiosity. There is no cure for curiosity.
(also attributed to Ellen Parr)

The best way to keep children at home is to make the home atmosphere pleasant - and let the air out of the tires.

That woman speaks eighteen languages and can't say no in any of them.

Four be the things I'd have been better without: love, curiosity, freckles and doubt.

Love is like quicksilver in the hand. Leave the fingers open, and it stays. Clutch it, and it darts away.

I don't know much about being a millionaire, but I'll bet I'd be darling at it.

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